Adult Needs, Part 2

ADULT NEEDS
By slimv

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		Chapter 2:  A New Beginning
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"Mind if I come in?" asked Cathy.  "I thought we could talk about yesterday."

Ashley shrugged and Cathy took her daughter's response as a yes as she walked
in holding a pack of cigarettes and an ashtray.  

"Mind if I smoke?" she asked as she lit a cigarette without waiting for her
daughter to answer.  "How do you feel this morning?"

Ashley squirmed on her bed.  She hadn't slept at all.  The truth was she felt
horrible.  Besides being tired enough to fall down, her skin felt as if ants
were crawling all over her and the smell of her mother's cigarette made it
worse.

"I'm OK I guess."

"You know what you did was wrong, don't you?"

Ashley nodded.

"You put your father and I in a very difficult position.  It's all we could
talk about last night.  If only you'd come to us sooner.  We could have
helped you.  I could have talked to you.  I would have told you any thing if
you had asked.  I wouldn't have been mad.  I'm your mother and I love you so
much."

Tears formed at the edge of Ashley's eyes and began to stream down her
cheeks.  "I'll quit Mom.  I promise.  I'll never do it again."

"I wish you could Honey, but it's not that easy.  You've been smoking too
long.  I think you're already addicted.  You feel terrible right now, don't
you?  I bet you feel like you're going to die if you don't have a cigarette."

Ashley nodded.

"You're a smoker now Honey.  You're addicted just like Mommy is."

"What do you mean?" asked Ashley.

"I mean that you're a smoker now, just like me.  As much as your father and I
want you to quit, we both know you can't.  I talked to your father last night
and he realizes that asking you to quit would as pointless as asking me to
quit.  That's why we've decided to give you our permission to smoke.  I
brought these for you," she said pointing to the pack of cigarettes and the
ashtray sitting on the night stand.  "Would you like one now?"

"No Mom.  I'm afraid.  I don't want to."

"Are you afraid of smoking or are you afraid of smoking in front of me?"

"You.  I don't want you and Daddy to see me smoking.  And I don't want Randy
to see me either."

"It's OK Honey.  I know how you feel.  I wasn't always a mother right?  I was
a little girl like you once.  But things are going to be different for you
than they were for me."

"What do you mean?" asked Ashley.  Her eyes were fixed on her mom's and she
hardly noticed when her mother placed the cigarette in her hand but she
closed her small fingers around the filter and held it.

"I mean your smoking is something we all need to accept.  My parents didn't
feel that way when I got hooked and we had a terrible relationship.  I'm not
going to let smoking come between us.  Your Daddy and I love you just as
much now that you smoke.  That cigarette in your hand doesn't change that."

Ashley put the cigarette to her lips and pulled on the filter.  The warm rich
smoke tasted good in her mouth and even better in her lungs.  But it wasn't
enough and she double pumped the next puff.  She was ashamed of the way she
was devouring the cigarette in her mother's presence but was powerless to do
otherwise.

"It's OK Honey.  I know it feels good."

"Do you feel like this when you smoke?" asked Ashley.

Cathy smiled knowingly at her daughter as she lit a cigarette from Ashley's
pack.  "Uh huh, but when I was young I had to hide the way I felt, because I
was ashamed.  I don't want you feeling like I did.  This isn't your fault.
Granted, you never should have started, but now that you have, the point is
kind of moot."

Cathy shifted on her daughter's bed and made her self more comfortable.  "So
tell me young lady.  What made you want to st art smoking in the first
place?"

Ashley looked down at the cigarette between her small fingers and blushed.
"I don't know," she said.  "I guess I thought it would make me look older and
pretty like you."

Cathy put a hand on her daughter's shoulder and kissed her.  "I'll take that
as a compliment," she said.

"Really?" asked Ashley.  "You're not mad at me.  And you're not going to
punish me?"

"Think about it Ashley.  Why would your father and I want to punish you?
What good would it do?  It certainly wouldn't keep you from smoking.  You'd
find away to do it no matter what we said and it wouldn't be because you were
being bad.  You'd do it because you had to do it.  That's what being addicted
is all about.  God knows I wish you never started.  But I'm going to tell you
something.  You're father and I are really proud of you for the way you've
handled this."

"Why," asked Ashley as she took a deep puff?

"Because you came to us on your own and told us about it.  That took a lot
of guts and a lot of maturity.  I don't know any other 8 year old who could
have shown as much maturity as you did yesterday.  Most adults couldn't have
done what you did."

Ashley beamed as the smoke poured past her lips.  "Really?"

"Really," said Cathy.  "You should be very proud of your self.  The way you
handled your self was very adult and that's why your father and I have
decided to treat you as one from now on."

Ashley's smile stretched from one ear to the other.  Her fear had been
replaced with pride.  "You're kidding, right?"

"I'm not kidding Honey.  You're father and I discussed it.  We both believe
smoking is an adult habit.  Now that you're a smoker, there's no way we can
treat you like a child.  That wouldn't be fair to you and that wouldn't be
fair to your brother."

"But Randy is 16 and I'm only 8.  He's more adult than me."

"No he's not Honey.  Randy is a boy and girls mature faster than boys.  Age
has nothing to do with this.  If Randy had been in your shoes, he never
could have told us the way you did.  You're much more mature than he is and
you proved that to us yesterday.  From now on there are three adults in this
house, you, Daddy and me.  Do you understand?"

"Does Randy know?"

"Your father is telling him now.  He's not going to like it but it's for his
good and yours, and it will help keep the peace.  He's going to be jealous at
first but he'll get used to it.  You'll see."

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