Daydream - Part 3

DAYDREAM - PART 3 (there's more than a grain of truth in this one)

It was Sunday morning. Alicia, as usual, was up early and drinking coffee in
the kitchen. She dragged deeply on her fifth Marlboro and looked at the half
smoked cigarette between her fingers. Her mind wandered back to the day that
she'd started her habit.

It was 1978, she was fourteen years old. She was in the kitchen with her
mother. She remembered it had been a Saturday morning. Her father had long
since left for work and her mother was sitting at the table in her housecoat,
smoking. 

Her mother always seemed to have a cigarette in her hand. There was a small
tobacconist's shop on the block where they lived. It stocked all kinds of
foreign cigarettes and her mother always smoked an English brand. She
remembered the green and white packet with Woodbines written on it. She often
got sent down to buy cigarettes for her mum. The tobacconist knew the family
and there was never a problem with ID.

Her mother's Woodbines were short, non-filtered cigarettes. She remembered
that her mother was always pressing her thumb against the end of the cigarette
to keep the tobacco packed tight. Her thumb always had a round brown stain on
it and her fingers were stained yellow brown from the cigarette smoke.

She watched as her mum put out her cigarette and reached for a new one. Almost
as an afterthought she extracted two cigarettes instead of one. She held one
out to Alicia.  "Do want to try one, love?" her mum asked.  Alicia blushed
bright red down to her boots. She was too embarrassed to speak.  "Go on, I
think you're old enough now. It can be our little secret"

Alicia took the cigarette. She had watched her mother often enough to know
what to do although she had never tried smoking before.  She put the cigarette
between her lips and leaned forward to the offered lighter. She drew
hesitantly and felt the warm smoke enter her mouth. She knew that her mum
inhaled the smoke into her lungs and did the same.  Her young lungs were
unprepared for the shock and she thought the resulting coughing fit was going
to kill her!  "Mum" she gasped, "that's terrible"

Her mother smiled and explained that it was normal to cough first time and
that it would get easier and a lot more enjoyable.

The second drag was a bit easier. She felt the strong smoke catch the back of
her throat but repressed the urge to cough and was pleasantly surprised by the
amount of smoke that she exhaled. She also felt for the first time the
tingling buzz as the nicotine entered her bloodstream.

She looked at the cigarette between her fingers. Some smoke was still coming
out of the end that she had sucked on and she noticed that the cigarette paper
was slightly moist from her lips. She pressed her thumb against the end of the
cigarette as she had seen her mother do a thousand times.  "You'll find that
if you exhale through your nose your lips don't get so moist and the end of
your cigarette doesn't get soggy," her mum said. 

Alicia brought the cigarette to her lips again and dragged again. She knew how
the smoke would feel against the back of her throat and again managed not to
cough. She let the inhaled smoke escape from her nose this time but didn't
breathe out hard enough and her face was enveloped in smoke that she waved
away with her hand.

"Just like this Honey" said her mum, showing off a perfect nose exhale.
Alicia dragged for the forth time, inhaled and breathed out a little harder.
Twin plumes of bluey gray smoke shot from her nostrils and she giggled
delightedly.  "I did it Mum!"

She tamped the tobacco with her thumb again and sucked the smoke in once more.
She felt lightheaded, a little woozy and the tingling had turned into a
buzzing which seemed to go right through her brain.

She felt her stomach lurch as the nausea came upon her. Her mother noticed the
change of expression on her face and took the cigarette gently from her
fingers.  "Best not overdo it first time young lady. The first few times might
make you feel a bit sick but that will pass"

Alicia stood up and gingerly made her way to the lounge and collapsed into an
armchair. Her head was telling her "nice" while her stomach said "nasty". She
could taste the strong smoke in her mouth and smell it on her fingers; it was
at once dirty but strangely appealing.

After half an hour or so the sickness had passed and Alicia whiled away her
Saturday. Instead of going out to play with her friends she stayed in the
house watching her mum clean and cook and smoke. She was slightly disappointed
that she was not offered another cigarette but she was still too embarrassed
to ask for one.

Next morning she came down to the kitchen as normal. Her Dad was having a
well-deserved lie-in while her mother was drinking coffee, reading the Sunday
papers and smoking. Alicia poured herself some coffee and sat down at the
table willing her mum to finish her cigarette.

Her mother crushed out the tiny butt in the ashtray and took a sip of coffee.
She set the cup down and reached for another cigarette. Alicia's face
brightened and then fell as she saw that her mother had only taken out one
cigarette. Bringing the lighter flame to the new cigarette her mother noticed
Alicia looking at her and said "Sorry love, do you want one too?"

Alicia reddened again but nodded. Her mother passed her the packet this time.
She opened it. It was half empty and easy to extract one of the small
cigarettes. She put it between her lips a little awkwardly and her mother
fired up the lighter and held the flame out to her. She leaned forward to the
flame and sucked in the smoke. She expected, and was ready for, the sensation
as the smoke hit her throat and lungs. She remembered to exhale through her
nose and smiled at her mother.

She put the cigarette between her lips again and sucked harder this time. The
jolt was bigger, as was the volume of smoke coming from her nose. She could
still see it coming out after three breaths. The smoke was still escaping from
the cigarette and she put her thumb over it.

The tingly feeling and buzzing started again and she closed her eyes to enjoy
it. She waited a little while before taking another drag to try and avoid the
nausea. So far it was working. She had the buzz but no sickness.

She managed another four drags before her stomach gave her the news and she
inexpertly stubbed out the inch long butt in the ashtray. She went slowly up
the stairs to the bathroom and washed her face with cold water. The nausea
wasn't as bad as the day before but the tingly feeling was still nice.

She stayed close to her mother all day again but no more cigarettes were
offered. Her Dad got up, went out for his usual lunch time drink, came home,
ate, slept on the couch. All in all, a normal lazy Sunday, but not normal for
Alicia. She had a sense of anticipation and was disappointed when bedtime came
around without her mum even looking like sharing her cigarettes again.

Monday dawned. It was a school day. Alicia got up, washed and dressed and
hurried down to the kitchen. Her Mum was dressed in a blue shop overall ready
for work in the supermarket down the block. She was smoking as usual.

Alicia hurriedly tucked into her cereal, trying to finish before her mum
finished her cigarette. She pushed the bowl away as her mother picked up her
cigarette packet. She extracted two cigarettes and raised her eyebrow towards
her daughter. Alicia nodded and took the offered cigarette. This time her
mother passed her the lighter and she lit the cigarette herself.  The nausea
stayed away and she left for school with a very pleasant nicotine buzz
coursing through her body. As she sat on the school bus she sniffed at the
smoky smell on her fingers to remind herself of what she had done.

The week settled into a routine with Alicia smoking a cigarette every morning.
Her drags were becoming bigger and she handled the cigarette less
self-consciously. She learned that as the cigarette got shorter the smoke
became stronger and hotter and she tried to smoke as much of the cigarette as
she could without burning her fingers.

On Thursday night Alicia had cigarette dreams. In her dream she was dragging
as heavily on the cigarette as her mother. Smoke poured from her nose but she
couldn't satisfy her body somehow. She was relieved when the alarm clock woke
her and she hurried through her preparations before rushing downstairs to join
the morning ritual with her mother.

Remembering her dream she dragged heavily on the cigarette and was rewarded
with a big nicotine hit into her body. She dragged again, before the smoke
from the first drag had entirely left her body. It seemed as though the
cigarette had no sooner started than it was time to put it out. Disappointedly
she took the final drag, extinguished the hot short butt in the ashtray and
left for school.

Her mother felt, rather than heard, Alicia arrive home from school that
afternoon. Kitchen furniture was banged. Pots and pans rattled as she put the
kettle on and looked irritatedly for the instant coffee.

"My, my, someone's in a bad mood" she thought before the penny dropped and she
realized what had happened. She walked into the kitchen to find her daughter
muttering under her breath with a face like thunder.  "Hiya love" she said
"Good day at school?" "No it was not!" Alicia snapped.  "Come and sit down
love, I've got something that will cheer you up"

Alicia sat down at the table and watched as her mother lit a cigarette. Her
eyes widened as her mother reached out and handed it to her. She took it
eagerly and dragged heavily on it. It was probably the biggest drag she had
ever taken on a cigarette. As the smoke entered her lungs she felt her
irritation fading. She quickly sucked more smoke in. Her nostril exhale plumed
as she executed her first double pump.

"I'm sorry love" said her mother, "I wasn't thinking. I started you off
smoking and forgot that your body would demand more nicotine as time went on.
I bet you feel a whole lot better now don't you" Alicia nodded, her lips busy
with her rapidly shrinking cigarette. The smoke was hot and burned her mouth
but she took it anyway and inhaled deeply. She needed it. All too soon it was
finished and she put it out in the ashtray.

Her mother put out her own cigarette and reached again for her packet. This
time she extracted two and handed one to her daughter. Alicia was still
breathing out smoke from the last cigarette but took it anyway. She relaxed as
she lit up and smoked at a more leisurely pace.

After dinner, her mother offered her another cigarette. She was embarrassed
because her father was at the table.  "It's ok love" her mother said, "I told
your father that we had a new smoker in the family. He doesn't mind"

Alicia smoked one more cigarette before bedtime. Her mother said that it would
help her sleep. She didn't wash her hands before getting into bed and fell
asleep with her smoky fingers under her nose.

From that day on, Alicia's smoking increased to six per day. She would have
two with her mother at breakfast. Two when she arrived home after a long
no-smoking day at school, one after dinner and one before going to bed.


After the first week of her increased consumption she was sitting at the table
with her mother when she proudly held her hand up to reveal a pale yellowy
brown circle on the fleshy part of her thumb.  "Look Mum, my thumb's burnt,
just like yours" "It's not a burn darling. It comes from the smoke. It's a
nicotine stain like these on my fingers" she held her brown fingers up to show
her daughter. "Your very first nicotine stain" - It won't be your last, I'll
bet, she thought to herself.

"Smoking's nice but it does have a down side. The smoke has tar in it. That's
what you can see on your thumb. The smoke makes you feel good but it leaves
the tar inside your lungs and makes you cough" "But I don't cough Mum" said
Alicia.  "You haven't been smoking very long, that's why" "Oh" said Alicia,
taking a long drag from her cigarette as if to test out the tar theory.

Alicia remained at six cigarettes per day for the rest of the term. By the
time the summer holidays came around she had been smoking regularly for nine
weeks. She found that she needed to clear her throat quite often but she
didn't develop a cough.  Her drags were now as deep as her mother's and she
could smoke the cigarette down to the last half -inch. The tips of her fingers
were now stained yellow as a result. 

She was happy with her new habit though. She felt grown up and her
relationship with her mother had become much stronger as they sat together and
smoked and talked. The only bad thing she had noticed about smoking was that,
with the exception of the first cigarette after getting home from school, the
nicotine "high" had all but disappeared. She asked her mum about it.

"It's because your body is used to the smoke now. If you were to go a long
time without a cigarette, your first couple of puffs would give you that
light-headed feeling again. That's why your first cigarette in the afternoon
gives you a buzz, because you've gone all day without smoking"

Her mum managed to get her a holiday job stacking shelves at the supermarket
where she worked. Alicia would have two cigarettes in the kitchen before
leaving for work with her mother.

Before starting work there was usually time for a quick cup of tea or coffee
and a cigarette in the staff canteen. Alicia remembered the room as being
warm, stuffy and smoke-filled. Almost all of the workers were women and she
couldn't think of one that didn't smoke. The smoky morning air was full of
noisy chatter and smokers' coughs. The women all smoked stronger cigarettes.
These were the days before "lights" and "low tar" brands. These women smoked
because they wanted to.  The split was pretty even between filters and
non-filters. Nicotine stained fingers and smiles were the norm rather than the
exception.

It seemed as though, whilst everybody talked to everybody else, the women
naturally sorted themselves out into groups of three. Alicia soon learned why.
The morning and afternoon coffee breaks, worked on a two-shift system, were
just long enough to smoke three cigarettes back to back.

Alicia and her mum sat with her mum's friend Jenny. She was a tiny woman,
about 48 years old and she had a split pupil in one eye that automatically
caught one's attention. She was also a non-filter smoker with a nice open
mouth/snap inhale.

At the morning tea break the three women sat together at a table. Her mother
pulled out her cigarettes and handed one to Jenny and looked enquiringly at
Alicia. Alicia nodded and took the cigarette. They smoked and talked and then
Jenny pulled out her cigarette packet and, without asking, handed one to
Alicia and one to her mother before taking one herself. 

Jenny hadn't quite finished her first cigarette and used it to light the
second. Alicia watched in surprise as her mother did the same. She had never
seen her do that before. She looked at her cigarette, it had maybe two drags
left in it. The new cigarette was between the fingers of her other hand and
she looked around the table in mild panic. 

The cigarette packets and lighters were in the women's pockets. There was no
lighter or matches on the table. She didn't want to look out of place so she
followed suit and lit the new cigarette with the butt of the old one. Her hand
was shaking a little and she was a bit clumsy, this being the first time that
she had chain-smoked. Neither Jenny nor her mum seemed to notice. They were
too busy discussing who had shot J.R. or something.

She sipped her coffee and smoked, joining in the conversation wherever she
could. She was about one third of a cigarette behind the two older women when
her mum brought out her cigarettes again. She groaned inwardly. This was her
first day at work and she was just about smoked out before the end of the
first tea break. 

Her mum handed one to Jenny and said "You don't want one do you love?" "No
thanks it's ok" Alicia replied, relieved at the prospect of giving her lungs a
break.  "It's a filthy habit anyway," joked her mum.

The cycle repeated itself for the rest of the day. Morning break, lunch break
and afternoon break. Alicia smoked two cigarettes to the other women's three.
When they arrived home they kicked off their shoes, sat down at the table to
rest their feet and smoked another cigarette over a cup of coffee. Her mum
busied herself preparing the evening meal, smoking continuously as she did so. 

Alicia helped with the other chores and made a cup of tea for her dad when he
arrived home from work.  When everything was bubbling away on the stove her
mother said, "Come and sit down love, we've just got time for a smoke before
the dinner's ready" She handed Alicia a cigarette and the two women smoked
while her father read the newspaper.  The meal was followed by another
cigarette and she smoked two more after that before heading upstairs to bed.

Alicia's chest was tight and her throat was a little sore. She calculated in
her head that she had smoked fourteen cigarettes that day. She cleared her
throat and fell into bed.  Every day at work brought the same routine and
every night she would climb the stairs with the accumulated tar of fourteen
more cigarettes in her lungs. The yellow stains on her fingers had darkened,
the yellow circle on her thumb was now brown and her throat clearing was
becoming more frequent.

The following Monday, just before they were due to leave for work, Alicia's
mum surprised her by handing her a full packet of cigarettes and a lighter.
"You'd better take these with you. You're a big girl now, you can't be
scrounging from me all day long" she joked.

At the morning coffee break she was on her second cigarette, now keeping pace
with Jenny and her mum. She saw her mother reach into her pocket but Alicia
reacted quicker, bringing out her own packet and handing each woman a
cigarette before taking one for herself. If Jenny noticed the increase in
Alicia's consumption she made no mention of it, whilst her mother raised a
curious eyebrow but said nothing.

Alicia was now smoking seventeen cigarettes every day and, before she knew it,
the remaining three disappeared into her lungs during the course of the
evening and she was a "pack a day" girl by the time her fifteenth birthday
arrived.

Despite her youth Alicia was fully accepted into the heavy smoking community
at the supermarket. She noticed some women would smoke five or six cigarettes
at lunch time and she would see the same women heading for the rest rooms
between breaks for yet more cigarettes.



One woman told her that her husband didn't like her smoking so she smoked
twenty cigarettes between leaving home in the morning and returning in the
evening. She later learned that the same woman's husband would sometimes bring
his "friends" to the house and expect her to service them or risk a physical
beating.  Alicia understood then, the pain that she could see in the woman's
eyes. "Welcome to the real world" she thought to herself.

By the end of the summer holidays her pack a day habit was firmly established.
Her fingers were stained brown like her mothers and a small but persistent
smoker's cough had taken the place of her throat clearing. She was dreading
going back to school. How would she get through the day without smoking? She
was saved from that fate by intervention from the very highest level.

Her mother's cough had been getting worse for a week or two but she dismissed
it as just a result of smoking too much. Without warning a chest infection
developed and she found herself dangerously ill and confined to bed.

Alicia stayed at home to look after her mum and missed the start of the school
term. She would clean the house, shop for groceries, do the washing and
ironing and sit at her mother's bedside and keep her company. Against the
doctor's orders her mum was still smoking. It was a struggle but she managed
it. Alicia would sit next to her and smoke with her.

One day the doctor arrived unexpectedly and made his way up to the bedroom to
see his patient. He noticed the smoky haze in the room and his glance settled
on an ashtray, half filled with unfiltered butts. He looked down at Alicia's
mother, who was trying to look as though butter wouldn't melt in her mouth,
and then turned to Alicia and said,

"I don't believe this. After all my warnings, not only is your mother still
smoking, but she's smoking non-filtered cigarettes. There must be twenty
cigarette ends in that ash tray" "Well, most of those are mine actually"
answered Alicia sweetly.

She thought the doctor was going to have a heart attack. He stammered and
spluttered before venting his disapproval on Alicia.

"You are still a child. You've no business smoking at your age, much less
non-filtered cigarettes" "And you" he said turning to Alicia's mother "You
should be ashamed of yourself, encouraging your child to smoke. I also warned
you that if you don't stop smoking, a recurrence of this infection might well
prove fatal" "If you want me to stop smoking you might as well kill me now"
said her mother.  "Well at least cut down and switch to filtered cigarettes."
replied the doctor.

The click of a lighter made the doctor turn around just in time to see Alicia
complete a cheek hollowing drag on her cigarette. She inhaled and completed a
perfect nose exhale towards him, smiling angelically as she did so.

The doctor closed his bag angrily and stormed out of the bedroom. The women
looked at each other. As they heard the front door slam they both cracked up
into howls of laughter, ending only when Alicia's mother started to cough.
"Come here girl and give me a drag" she gasped, smoking from Alicia's fingers
and then starting to cough again.

Later that day her mother reluctantly agreed that she would switch to a
filtered cigarette and Alicia went off to the tobacconist.  She explained the
situation to old Mr. Felder, who suggested that her mother might try Marlboro
Reds.  "They're still quite strong but at least they're filtered" he said.

"What about you Baby Doll? Are you going to stick with the Woodbines or switch
too?" "I suppose I'll have to give mum some moral support so I'll change too"
said Alicia

Mr. Felder was in his seventh heaven. "A smoking fetish and a tobacconist
shop," he thought to himself. "Could anyone have a better job?"

He had been selling cigarettes to Alicia for years now. He'd watched a
happy-go-lucky kid picking up cigarettes for her mum and dad and wondered how
long it would be until she was dropping by to feed her own addiction.

He hadn't immediately known of her mother's decision to let Alicia smoke but
he had noticed that the quantity of cigarettes they were buying was slowly
increasing. It hadn't been long before he noticed the yellow stains starting
to appear on Alicia's fingers and her constant throat clearing.

He had asked her one day how much she was smoking and had been surprised at
the speed of her addiction. In little over four months she had gone from
non-smoker to one pack per day.

He was glad that the counter and his long brown store coat hid his erection.
Even at fifty-five his fetish could still cause a stir in his underpants. He
dug in the pocket of his coat and emerged with a pack of Senior Service, also
unfiltered.

"Have a last real smoke with me then my dear." He said, offering the packet
over the counter. He watched the woman-child's fingers eagerly extract a
cigarette and place it between her lips. She looked to him expectantly for a
light and he obliged, lighting his own afterwards.

They smoked and made conversation whilst Mr. Felder enjoyed the sight of
Alicia expertly inhaling and exhaling the harsh smoke. All too soon she
extinguished her cigarette in the counter-top ashtray, picked up her carton of
Marlboro Red and bid Mr. Felder goodbye, trailing smoke behind her as she
left. 

"Come on then Mum, it's time to say goodbye to your old friends" Alicia had
climbed the stairs to bring her mother's bedtime drink and she shook out the
last two unfiltered cigarettes from the packet. She lit them both, passing one
to her mother, and then sat down on the edge of the bed dragging deeply on her
cigarette.  "Bloody quacks!" said her mother "they take all the fun out of
life" "Cheer up Mum, it's not the end of the world, at least you can still
smoke."

Alicia looked down at the small cigarette burning between her fingers. She had
only ever smoked the non-filtered Woodbines and didn't really appreciate her
mother's concern about switching brands. She dragged heavily on the cigarette
and finished it off with a double pump before grinding it out in the ashtray.

She took the red and white Marlboro packet from her pocket and placed it on
her mother's bedside table ready for morning time, kissed her mom good night
and made her way to her bedroom.

The alarm clock jolted her awake at 6 a.m. the next morning and she hopped
straight out of bed and headed for the bathroom. She was still in the early
stages of her habit and hadn't yet needed to keep cigarettes by the bed to get
her started each morning but she was eagerly anticipating her first smoke of
the day as she went down the stairs to start her dad's breakfast.

She took a red and white packet from the opened carton in the kitchen and
stripped off the cellophane and foil coverings. The packet was bigger than she
was used to, as was the cigarette she extracted from it. She looked at the
brown filter with its perfect white filling before putting it between her lips
and lighting up.

She dragged deeply as she was used to doing, but the filter held back the
volume of smoke and the smoke that she inhaled seemed much less than usual.
She dragged hard again and inhaled deeply. She looked at the filter. Smoke was
still issuing from it and there was a smudge of pale yellow spoiling the once
pristine whiteness.


She dragged hard on the filter again and saw the yellow stain darken to brown
as the cigarette shortened. She thought about the toxic tar, some of which was
caught in the filter, the rest coating her lungs. She felt a tingling
sensation between her legs and realized that she was becoming aroused at the
thought and the sight of the poison she was sucking so eagerly into her lungs.
"You're sick," she said to herself.

She double pumped the cigarette, reached towards the ashtray and then decided
she hadn't had enough smoke. She took another cigarette from the packet and
was lighting it from the butt of the first when her father walked into the
kitchen.

"My, my you're smoking up a storm little lady" he said as he sat down at the
table, pulling out his own cigarettes as he did so.  "You want to be careful
with that pretty little body of yours or you'll end up like your mother" "It's
these new cigarettes, dad, I don't seem to get enough smoke from just one" 

She looked over enviously as her father lit up an unfiltered chesterfield and
picked up the morning paper. She dragged as hard as she could on her new
cigarette before busying herself with the breakfast chores.

All that day she found herself smoking two Marlboros in succession whereas
before she would have smoked just one unfiltered. As she picked up her
cigarette packet for a last smoke before bedtime, she realized that there were
two cigarettes left. 

Used to smoking a whole pack every day she suddenly realized that this was all
that remained of her second packet. She lit up and smoked thoughtfully, again
watching the transformation of the clean white filter to a dirty dark brown. 

As she neared the filter her nicotine stained fingers reached again for the
packet and she chained into her fortieth cigarette of the day. 

She had become a two-pack-a-day girl.

It soon became clear that money was in short supply for the family. With her
mother unable to work, Alicia knew that she would have to find a job if only
to pay for the rising cigarette bill.

Trouble was she was under age and unqualified. Putting her pride in her back
pocket she marched down to the supermarket and begged, pleaded and cajoled the
manager into taking her back on a cash-in-hand basis until she was sixteen.

She settled back into the routine of the store, working upstairs in the
warehouse. She liked the warehouse job because she could sneak off to the
restroom for extra cigarette breaks. She had resumed her smoking partnership
with Jenny and looked forward to sharing her non-filters again. Strangely
enough, Jenny didn't seem to mind sharing Alicia's Marlboros either.

The months flew past and her sixteenth birthday approached. Her two-pack habit
was now firmly entrenched and augmented by Jenny's woodbines.  Alicia's mum
had now recovered and was back at work. Not wanting to be the cause of her
friend's relapse Jenny even gave up her beloved woodbines and became a
Marlboro girl too.

Alicia knew that she couldn't go back to her studies with such a heavy smoking
habit. The thought of spending forty minutes in a classroom without a
cigarette literally brought her out in a cold sweat and so it was, against her
parents' better judgment, that she joined the full-time staff of the
supermarket.

Despite lacking in formal education, Alicia was smart and had a bubbly
personality and she was soon promoted to the front of the store working on the
checkout.



Her pack of Marlboros was clearly visible through the thin blue material of
her overall pocket and some customers obviously disapproved of such a young
girl smoking and visibly cringed as her brown stained fingers passed them
their change. Most people didn't notice though, while one or two were
obviously attracted by these visible signs of her habit.

She noticed that a tall well-muscled young man had started shopping with
increasing regularity and always chose her checkout counter. Habitually
dressed in a short-sleeved t-shirt and denim jeans, a tattoo on his bicep
announced to the world that his name was Eddie.

The hard hat was a giveaway and she knew that he worked on the construction
site just across the road. As she passed over his change one day, his hand
closed over her fingers for just an instant too long and she knew that he was
interested.

By the end of the week he had asked her out and she had accepted. So began the
long courtship with her husband-to-be and Neve's father.

Eddie was nineteen, Alicia only sixteen but the two sweethearts soon became
inseparable. Neither had much spare cash, Alicia's money was helping out at
home while Eddie helped to support his widowed mother. So, apart from a movie
once a week, most of their time together was spent at their respective homes
watching TV or listening to music.

Eddie was a non-smoker, pushed a few weights and generally was in good shape.
He didn't drink much. He worked as a steel fixer and knew that hangovers
didn't mix with heights.

One thing Alicia had noticed was that Eddie always seemed to want to kiss her
just after she had inhaled from her cigarette. Not that she minded, and their
kisses were almost always surrounded with exhaled smoke from her nose.

It was a month or so into their relationship that Eddie confessed what she
already suspected. He was turned on by her smoking. He liked to watch her drag
hard on her cigarette. He liked to see the smoke coming from her nose and he
loved the sight and smell of her brown fingers.

Eddie respected Alicia's wishes not to have sex before marriage but both knew
of the frustration that such close proximity, mixed with Eddie's smoking
fetish, caused.

It was normal for them to spend time in their bedrooms listening to records
and tapes. Alicia would give Eddie the long smoky kisses he loved but both
parties had so far managed to keep one foot on the floor.

Alicia knew the effect she was having on her boyfriend. The wet patch on the
front of his jeans was a dead giveaway. She teased him unmercifully also,
often reaching across his body for the ashtray and letting her hand brush
against the bulging fly of his trousers.

One day Alicia surprised him. She reached across him to tap her ash in the
ashtray and on the way back her hand stopped and gently massaged the front of
his jeans. Eddie groaned with delight and closed his eyes.

He felt the tension in his clothing ease and realized that Alicia had already
managed to undo his belt and open the button and fly of his jeans. He opened
his eyes to see his swollen member poking through the front of his jockey
shorts. He saw Alicia's nicotine stained fingers, still holding her cigarette,
lightly caressing him.

She traced the brown stained filter along the length of his cock before
stopping at the purple circumcised glans where a large clear drop of pre-cum
was suspended. She dipped the filter into the liquid and raised it to her
lips, tasting the salty fluid with her tongue before dragging heavily on the
cigarette. As she removed the filter from her mouth she saw that the filter
was stained dark brown from the effect of the tar passing through the wetness.

Her body shuddered as the orgasm rose through her and she inhaled deeply again
from the filter, her hands trembling as she did so. She leaned forward to
share the smoky kiss with Eddie before returning her brown fingers and
cigarette to his hardness. She gently rubbed backwards and forwards three or
four times before Eddie made a strangled noise and a stream of hot white semen
shot past Alicia's face and hit the wall behind her.

Her first instinct was to let go but Eddie held her hand and showed her how to
complete her task and she milked the remaining fluid out on to the eiderdown.

Eddie went out to the bathroom and came back with some toilet tissue to mop up
the mess. Alicia tasted some of the white liquid that had spilled on to her
fingers, enjoying the saltiness. She then took a final drag from her
cigarette, noticing the extreme brownness of the filter, before crushing it
out in the ashtray.

Eddie sat back down on the bed with a contented sigh. They both looked
seriously at each other for a full ten seconds before bursting out into fits
of laughter.

So started a very pleasant ritual. Almost every evening Eddie would vent his
frustrations into a wad of Kleenex. Alicia, for her part, become more adept at
prolonging the enjoyment whilst the sight of the toxic tar in her filter would
almost always bring her to orgasm, aided by Eddie's stroking fingers. 

Alicia was happy to indulge Eddie's smoking fetish but she also had needs of
her own. She enjoyed her smoking habit but she had realized that there was a
deeper and darker fascination. 

She was aroused by the smoke and what it did to her body. When she looked at
her hand she wasn't disgusted by the nicotine stains she saw there. She saw
only how the tar and nicotine had taken over her body, browning her fingers,
yellowing her teeth and blackening her lungs.

But more than that, she needed to share. It was no coincidence that all of
Alicia's friends now smoked, some with their parents' permission, some
secretly. Now it was Eddie's turn.

Eddie was so wrapped up in his enjoyment of the smoky kisses he didn't realize
that Alicia was feeding her inhaled smoke back into his mouth and prolonging
the kisses so that he had to breathe the second hand smoke into his lungs.

She watched carefully, and noted with satisfaction, the traces of residual
smoke coming from Eddie's mouth and nose after each bout of tongue wrestling.

After three evenings of feeding him her smoke in this way, she surprised him
by giving him a fairly large drag of uninhaled smoke. His lungs had been
slowly conditioned and the strong smoke was accepted without coughing or
gagging.

He broke off the kiss and sat up on the bed.  "wow" he said, exhaling smoke as
he talked, "that was neat. My head went all funny"

The tone was set. Once every evening, Alicia would give him a lungful of
uninhaled smoke, gradually increasing the size of the drag. Eddie began to
look forward to the moment, never knowing exactly when it would come.

After two weeks, when they were midway through one of their mutual touching
sessions, Alicia brought the filter of her cigarette to his lips and he sucked
eagerly. Her other hand was rubbing urgently along his erection and, as he
inhaled, he came.

Every night thereafter he would smoke from her fingers as she brought him to
orgasm. He became conditioned, associating the enjoyment of the smoke with the
thrill of sexual release.

Alicia took great pleasure in watching Eddie's gradual but certain descent
into addiction and kept up the pressure.

Her fingernail painting sessions became more frequent and provided the perfect
excuse for the next stage of her plan.

"Eddie, be a love and light me a cigarette, my nails are wet" she would say,
watching from the corner of her eye as Eddie eagerly complied with her
request, inhaling the first drag lustily as he did so.

That inhaled first drag soon became a double pump and, three months from the
start of her plotting, she played her final card. Keeping her back to Eddie
she extracted two cigarettes from her pack, lit them and turned back to him,
offering him the lit cigarette.

"I think you're about ready for that now love," she said with a smile.

Within six months Eddie was a pack-a-day smoker.

Alicia reached her eighteenth birthday, technically a virgin but by no means
inexperienced. The young couple had been saving their money and, after a
simple marriage ceremony, they moved into a small apartment to begin their
married life together.

Eddie got a pay rise and insisted that Alicia stop working at the supermarket.
She kept house and cooked for her husband but still had plenty of time on her
hands. Her two-pack-per-day habit gradually increased to three and climbed
slowly but steadily towards four packs.

She paid lip service to the medical advice during her pregnancies and cut back
to three packs-per-day but was back up to eighty cigarettes every day by the
time Neve was one month old.

She thought back fondly to those days. Eddie had been a good husband. Their
respective fetishes had complemented each other and their sex life had been
both active and enjoyable.

Then, six months earlier, he had kissed her goodbye at the door, left for work
at the construction site and never came back. He had fallen twelve floors to
his death.

She realized that it was now six months since she had been with a man. Since
Eddie's death she had never even looked at another man. Maybe it was time to
get back on that horse?

A vision of David Carter leapt into her mind. She realized that he reminded
her of Eddie. Just as quickly she dismissed the thought. He was her daughter's
boyfriend and not much more than a child himself.

She was roused from her reverie by the sound of Neve coughing. She imagined
the click of her daughter's lighter; the first double pump of the day and then
the coughing subsided.

Alicia remembered that Neve had invited David around to the house that
afternoon and smiled to herself. "Maybe there was some fun to be had with
young Mr. Carter!"