Dr. Blacklung, I Presume?, Part 13 | |
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Dr. Blacklung, I Presume By: slimv ------------------------------------------------------------ Chapter 13: He Loves Me He Loves Me Not ------------------------------------------------------------ Two days had passed since Katie had been discharged from the hospital. Her parents had reservations about letting her return to the center, but yielded to their daughter's wishes. The accident was due to negligence but there would be no lawsuit. Qualified technicians had made all the necessary adjustments to the equipment and Dr. Avery assured them that what happened to Katie would never happen to another patient. The irony of his daughter's situation still boggled Bill O'Hare's mind. The nicotine overdose had caused her heart to stop beating. She had literally suffered a heart attack at the age of 16. But she was still smoking. Not only was she still smoking but she was smoking too much. And she was doing it under doctor's orders. Dr. Avery admitted it was unusual for a physician to recommend a he art attack patient continue smoking, but claimed it was absolutely necessary in Katie's situation. The Smokygen malfunction had stimulated Katie's addiction to the point that her body required the equivalent of 600 cigarettes a day. Obviously it was humanly impossible for her to smoke that many cigarettes, so the Smokygen machine would have to become a part of her nightly routine for the rest of her life. Dr. Avery was working on a portable model for her to take on trips, but until then she would be limited to living either at the center or at home- once a Smokygen unit was installed there. Any reduction to Katie's current nicotine levels could trigger a shock to her body that she may not be able to recover from. It was imperative that Katie smoke 24 hours a day, seven days a week and 365 days a year because her life depended on it. Bill and Margie realized there were only two choices. Katie's nicotine level could be maintained consistently and safely if she were hook ed up to the Smokygen device permanently- much like a respirator. The machine would help her smoke 24 hours a day but it would rob her of her independence and quality of life. The other option was for Katie to smoke to become a carton a day smoker. If she wanted a life apart from the Smokygen device she would need to smoke every waking minute of her life. Avery's legal team was already working on ways to solve the logistical problems of Katie's addiction. They had filed SSI papers with the government claiming disability. The government would become responsible for every expense associated with her disabling addiction including cigarettes, Smokygen therapy, physical rehabilitation as well as trauma therapy. There were also the anti-smoking rules to work around. Once the government deemed her disabled due to her addiction, all public buildings, which she frequented, would need to allow for her smoking. This meant Katie would be allowed by law to smoke in school, churc h, movie theaters and any public building. She would even be allowed to smoke on airplanes and elevators. The only obstacle blocking Katie's freedom was Katie her self. She had spent the last two days since being discharged alone in her room with her cigarettes. She had refused visits from her family, friends and Kenny. She was embarrassed and ashamed of what she'd become. ----------------------------------------------- Katie crushed out her finished Pall Mall in the ashtray and looked at her watch. It had taken three minutes for her to finish the cigarette. She remembered what Dr. Avery had told her. If she was going to finish 10 packs a day she would need to average 15 cigarettes an hour or 1 every four minutes. She was doing great but she wondered if she would be able to keep it up day in and day out. Her lungs were so tired and sore. She looked up when she heard the knock on the door followed by Nurse Betty's voice. Nurse Betty had been given instructi ons to count the cigarette buts in Katie's ashtray every two hours and give her a fresh ashtray. "I wish you'd come out your room and mingle with the other patients," she said as she counted the Pall Mall buts. Katie shook her head and lit another Pall Mall. "I know how you're upset about the accident," said Betty. "Who wouldn't be? But it's not the end of the world. So you smoke a lot. I know it feels awkward right now but you'll get used to it and by the way, I only found 28 buts in your ashtray. You need to pick up the pace." Katie exhaled as she nodded. "I'm trying," she said. "I timed my self on the last cigarette and did it in three minutes. It's just so hard. Dr. Avery says I can't stop smoking even when I'm eating. Do you know how stupid I look?" Betty touched Katie's shoulders and said, "You don't look stupid Katie. You're a beautiful, intelligent young woman and you smoke cigarettes. People around here think that's a charming combination." "It's not the people around here I'm worried about," said Katie. -------------------------------------- Kenny packed the kitchen with the phone to his ear. It was times like this he wished he had a phone of his own. His mother was sitting at the kitchen table sipping coffee, pretending not to listen to his conversation with Katie's mom. "You're kidding? She said that? You and me? What? Because you smoke and she dreamed she quit? That's insane. Yeah, I know. I've tried to visit five times since she got back and she won't see me. What? 10 packs a day. You're kidding right. I know she's your daughter and all Mrs. O'Hare, and I know you smoke, but 10 packs a day? Don't you think that's a little disgusting when you think about it? I'm not saying that. I'm just saying I don't know what to think about this any more. I'm just not sure I can do it. It's so weird. OK, OK, I promise. I'll think about it. No I can't. All I can promise right now is that I'll think about it. Mrs. O'Hare, I don't mean to cut you short or any thing, but this isn't a good time to talk. I gotta go now. Yes I am. I'm going to try to get back up there later tonight. OK. You too. Bye." "Do you want to talk about it Honey?" asked Kenny's mom as she sipped from her mug. "Not really. That was Katie's mom. She was just filling me in on some of the stuff that's been going on since Katie got out of the hospital." "I wasn't eves dropping on your conversation, but I thought I overheard you saying she's smoking 10 packs of cigarettes a day. Did I hear right?" "Yeah Mom, that's what I said, but I don't need a lecture and neither does she. Katie didn't do it on purpose. It was an accident. One of the machines they were using to help her breath messed up. That's why she ended up in the hospital. She's really embarrassed about having to smoke so much. That's why she won't see me." "I'm sorry Kenny. You won't get a lecture from me. I heard about what happened. I ran into Sylvia Meyers at the grocery store. Her niece works at Bette Davis. She told me every thing. It's terrible. Honey I know your father and I said some unkind things about Katie the last time we talked and I want to apologize. That wasn't very Christian like of us to judge her like we did. She's suffering Honey and so are you. I realize you have feelings for this girl and I know you must be going through Heck about right now. Oh dear! Pardon my French Kenny. I didn't mean to say the 'H' word." ----------------------------------------------- Dr. Avery wrung his hands in frustration. Joan Dupree was one of his most difficult patients. It wasn't her personality. It was a combination of her Puritan beliefs and dark fetish tendencies that made working with her difficult. He looked at her daughter, Megan, for support. It was she who suggested the program to Joan. She wanted her mom to start making the most of the time she had left, instead of hiding in her house smoking her cigarettes in lonely shame. She wanted her mom to fulfill her life's ambition. Joan had been diagnosed with small cell cancer two years ago. She and her family celebrated the news of her imminent demise with joy and pride. But their world collapsed a year later when Joan's cancer mysteriously went into remission. She took the loss hard and so did her husband who had given the best years of life doing every thing in his power to assist his wife destroy her lungs. He felt his efforts had been wasted. He couldn't accept his wife as a cancer survivor and rather than pick up where they left off, he chose to leave the marriage. At 36, Megan was a beauty. One had only to look at her mother to see where she got her looks. Unfortunately Megan was a non-smoker. This was a shame thought Avery, but he was here to help her mom and tried to stay focused on that fact. Tad, her 16-year-old son sat dutifully beside his mother as she smoked. He'd been her rock since his father left. Life had been confusing to him from the beginning. His birth had been unplanned. His sister was old enough to be his mom and his parents were old enough to be his grand parents. He grew up knowing his mother was different than his friend's mom and it wasn't just her advanced age. His mother smoked but that wasn't unusual. It was why she smoked that separated her from the other smoker's he knew. The idea of lung disease held little appeal to most smokers he knew. But his mother thrived on it. She was obsessed with it. That made it difficult when he was younger. How many times had he complimented his friend's smoking mothers by suggesting their lungs must look like blackened cesspools? His mother had smiled and giggled to no end when his father had said such things to her. But he quickly found it didn't have the same positive effect on his friend's mothers. His mother's obsession with lung disease had left him utterly confus ed. He thought she would have been proud and pleased when he tried smoking two years earlier but her reaction was that of disappointment, fear and anger. She made it clear to him, as did his father, that he was never to smoke and that as far as the family was concerned; smoking was a pleasure reserved exclusively for his mother. These mixed messages caused something dark and sexual to develop and stir within him whenever he saw a beautiful woman smoking. The cancer's remission and the subsequent divorce had obliterated Joan's self-esteem. She had come to believe she was unworthy of male affection because her lungs, after years of punishment, were free of disease. She had come to the Bette Davis Center with hopes of restoring her confidence. "You've been with us for almost 60 days Mrs. Dupree. Most patients with similar problems finish the program in half this time. You've excelled in your classes but this isn't surprising; considering this is the second time you've taken them. You've done every thing we've asked except for one thing. Do you know what that one thing is Mrs. Dupree?" Joan covered her face with her hands. "I know," she said. "But I can't do it. I told you I couldn't when I came here. You knew it. I told you I was afraid, so why do you keep pressing me?" "Because Mom," said Megan. "We want you to make the most of the time you have left. We want you to enjoy your life instead of just waiting for the cancer to take you. Isn't this what you wanted? Isn't this the reason you started smoking in the first place?" Dr. Avery looked at Megan. "I concur with your daughter Mrs. Dupree even though I would have stated it differently. I must remind you that you were aware of the sex therapy when you signed the consent forms. This isn't something new. You've known about it from day one. It's crucial to your development and we can't let you graduate until you fulfill the requirement. As I've said before, the center can arrange for a professional surrogate if you don't have access to a suitable partner." "Surely Dr. Avery, you can't expect me to be intimate with a stranger. I'm not that kind of woman." "It doesn't have to be a stranger Mrs. Dupree. I've said it before and I'll say it again. Tad is perfectly capable stepping up to the plate and filling your needs." "Do you hear what you're saying," asked Joan? "Tad is a child. He's my child. That would be incest!" "Technically speaking it is, but what's the harm?" asked Dr. Avery. "Tad is 16. He's of age and can legally consent to sex with anyone who is his age or older. Besides, its not as if we're talking about rape. It's been my experience that most young males have sexual fantasies about their mothers. Believe me when I'd say you'd both get something from the experience. If you won't listen to me then listen to your children Tad turned a red face to his mother. "It's OK with me Mom. I think it would be good for both o f us like the doctor said." "I think it's a good idea too," said Megan. "He's exactly what you need Mom. I can't think of a better guy for you. Besides, it's not like its forever, it's just to help you get your confidence back." |
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