Lisa's Quest, Part 2

    2. Friday Night - Smoking School.

    Lisa sat down at her table and once again reached for her Tic-Tacs.
Hoolihan's was a popular bar and restaurant frequented by young professionals.
Lisa rarely sat in the smoking area, and as she waited she realized she'd
never really paid attention to people smoking. Now, however, she was going to
watch how people looked when they smoked. Lisa watched with interest as two
women at the next table lit cigarettes and began to smoke. From the way they
were dressed, Lisa guessed they were professional women stopping after work
for a drink. Lisa watched with fascination as the first woman, a stunning
blond in her early thirties, took a deep drag on her cigarette and quickly
pulled the smoke deeply into her lungs through her nose. After several moments
she tipped her head back and began exhaling a long, continuous stream of smoke
toward the ceiling. Her colleague, a cute brunette in her early twenties,
pulled on her long, white cigarette in much the same way and inhaled, but she
let smoke escape from her mouth and nose while she talked. Lisa was impressed
at how elegant they looked. God, she thought with rising anticipation, I'm
going to learn to do that, too!

    "Hey, Lisa!" Patti's voice brought Lisa back to reality. "God, Lise, you
look great!" Patti walked up to the table and Lisa stood to give her a hug. As
they hugged, Lisa noticed the smell of fresh cigarette smoke mixed with
perfume on Patti's clothes. Patti's just had one, Lisa thought. Boy, will she
be surprised when I tell her my plan!

    Patti sat down and smiled. "Hey, I never expected to find you in the
smoking section. God, I was sure that if you got here first, you'd make us sit
over THERE!" Patti gestured with disdain toward to the side of the restaurant
where smoking wasn't permitted. "I appreciate sitting here," Patti grinned,
"so I can smoke. Believe me," she added, "I need another one right now!"

    Patti was a petite but shapely brunette with naturally curly hair. She was
extremely outgoing and attractive. When Patti walked into a room, men always
noticed. Patti took her navy blue cigarette case, extracted a cigarette, and
set the case on the table. Lisa watched as Patti flicked her lighter, igniting
the tip of the long, white cigarette which rested between her lips. Patti left
the cigarette hanging there for a few moments while a cloud of smoke began to
swirl around her head. Putting her lighter in her cigarette case, Patti
suddenly pulled hard on the cigarette. Lisa noticed how Patti's cheeks
hollowed out while she sucked. Finally, Patti took the cigarette in her
fingers and removed it from her mouth while she pulled the smoke deep down
into her lungs. Patti's breasts visibly lifted upwards as her lungs expanded
to receive the smoke she'd just inhaled. (Lisa had always been jealous of
Patti's big tits.) Moments later Patti began to exhale smoke in an upward
trajectory from between her pursed lips. "That's better," she signed. "So,"
Patti asked as the last wisps of smoke escaped from her mouth, "I'm ready to
talk. What's up?" Lisa decided that Patti smoked in a very stylish way. Maybe
that's why men always notice her, she decided.

    Lisa proceeded to tell Patti about the day's events; about her job
interview, the smoking law firm and her talk with Heather. Halfway through the
story, the waitress took their order. As Lisa continued, she saw Patti was
fascinated by the story. "And so," Lisa announced as she ended her tale, "I've
decided I've got to learn to smoke. Otherwise I can't get that job." She
paused. "And, Patti, you're going to teach me!"

    Patti exhaled smoke from her final drag on the cigarette and crushed it
out in the ashtray. "My God," Patti exclaimed, "this is unbelievable! You mean
to tell me that there's a law office in this town where you want to work,
which is the best law firm in the city, but where the only people they'll hire
are smokers?" Patti laughed out loud with delight. "God, that is way cool!"
she exclaimed. "Listen, do they need anyone to work in marketing?" Patti
worked at a public relations firm downtown. "C'mon, Patti," Lisa chided, "be
serious."

    "Okay," Patti answered. She thought for a moment. "But Lise," she went on,
"are you sure you want to do this? I mean, look, you know me. I love to smoke.
God, I'd rather smoke than breathe! But do you know what you're getting
yourself into? Once you start smoking, pretty soon you'll be hooked! Have you
thought about that?"

    "Listen, Patti," Lisa answered firmly, "I've thought about it constantly
all afternoon. Dammit, I want that job. I'm not crazy about learning to
smoke." Lisa paused for a moment and frowned. Actually, she mused, she was
becoming more fascinated with the idea every minute. "But," she went on, "I'll
do whatever I have to do to get what I want. You know me, too, Patti. If I
want it, I'm going to get it!" Patti shook her head in disbelief and laughed
again.

    Lisa became irritated. "Listen, Patti, I'm serious," continued Lisa. "I
even bought myself cigarettes at the drug store on my way over tonight." Lisa
pulled a pack of Marlboro 100's from her purse, "See?" she said. "Marlboros,
the same brand you smoke; the long ones; right? So unless you think for some
reason I can't learn to smoke, I'm ready to go!"

    Patti smiled at Lisa's persistence. "Listen, kid, I'm ready to teach you.
That's not a problem. And you'll be able to do it. Believe me, cigarettes are
like magic, darling. Once you start, before you know it you want to smoke all
the time." Patti giggled, looking at the Marlboro 100's sitting on the table.
"But first, Lisa, I'm going to have to take you to smoking school." "What do
you mean?" Lisa asked, still irritated. "I mean," Patti went on, "you don't
know shit about smoking!"

    Patti lit another cigarette. "Look, I know you mean well, but you don't
understand much about smoking, do you?" Lisa shook her head. "You see," Patti
went on after exhaling, "cigarettes come in different types, different
strengths, different lengths, and different widths. Before you buy cigarettes,
you need to know more than a brand name. You've got to know what you want."
Patti took another drag and continued to talk while she mixed exhaled smoke
with her words. "First, let me explain about different types of cigarettes.
You've got menthol cigarettes, and then you've got regular cigarettes. Yeah, I
smoke Marlboro's but I smoke Marlboro Menthols." Patti looked at the burning
cigarette in her hand. "See, this smoke is mentholated, so it tastes cooler."
Patti took another big drag. "You bought regular Marlboros, not menthol."

    Lisa looked embarrassed, so Patti said, "Look don't worry. That's what I'm
here for, Lise. Let me continue. Cigarettes also come in different strengths;
there are full-flavor, like the Marlboros you bought, which are the strongest;
then there are lights, which are, well, lighter; and then there are
ultra-lights, which are like trying to smoke air. I smoke lights, not
full-flavor, Marlboro Menthol Lights." Lisa felt vaguely stupid. She should
have known to ask.

    "Then the third thing. Cigarettes come in different lengths. You're right,
I smoke the long ones. They're called 100's." Patti took a quick drag and
inhaled. "That part is obvious. I smoke Marlboro Menthol Lights 100's." Patti
pulled the pack out of her case as she exhaled again. "See the pack?" she
said. "It's different from the one you bought. And actually, there make even
longer cigarettes, called 120's. Lots of women smokers prefer them. But
personally, I like these best." Patti looked at her cigarette and, as if to
prove her point, took another long drag.

    "Well, which ones should I start smoking?" Lisa asked. "Here's what I
think, Lisa," Patti answered, exhaling again. "Start with my brand, Marlboro
Menthol Light 100's. They'll be easier to start with than the stronger ones."
Patti pointed to the gold pack sitting on the table. "But after you get
started, you might want to try those. They have a stronger tobacco taste. Lots
of people like them." Patti smiled. "I just like menthol better."

    Lisa thought for a moment. "Okay," she said, "when can we start?" Patti
crushed out her cigarette in the ashtray. "How about right now?" she answered
with a big smile. "God, this is great," Patti went on. "I get to turn you into
a smoker! This is just too cool." Patti picked up her cigarette case. "But be
careful to follow my instructions, Lise," she added, "because if you get too
much nicotine too soon, you'll make yourself sick." Lisa frowned. "Don't
worry," Patti reassured her, "I'll show you what to do every step of the way."
Patti took out another cigarette, lit it, and then handed it to Lisa. "Here,
honey," she said, "take it. It won't bite."

    Lisa put the burning cigarette between her fingers. She watched it with
fascination. Lots of smoke curled from the burning end, but some also came
from the filter where Patti had taken a drag. "Hey, Lisa," Patti interrupted,
"you won't learn to smoke by looking at it! Are you ready or not?" Lisa
blushed as Patti lit another one for herself. "Okay," Patti began, exhaling
through her nose, "I'm going to smoke, too, but remember, do what I say, and
not what I do. By that I mean, I always inhale but I don't want you to try
inhaling yet. First get used to the sensation of having smoke in your mouth;
later I'll show you how to inhale it. Don't worry," Patti grinned, "we'll get
to that part." She took a big drag and pulled it deeply into her lungs. "Ahh,"
Patti sighed, holding the smoke deep inside, "THIS is the good part! Inhaling
is what makes smoking fun! We'll get to that later." Lisa was becoming edgy.
"Fine, Patti," she said, "tell me what to do."

    "All right," Patti began, "try putting the cigarette in your mouth,
between your lips, and suck on it very gently. But be careful not to breath
in. And as soon as you feel your mouth fill with smoke, blow it right out.
Like this." Patti demonstrated the technique, taking a small puff and
immediately exhaling the smoke.

    Lisa put the burning cigarette between her lips and carefully applied
suction to the filter. Immediately she felt the strong sensation of the
mentholated smoke and a very bitter taste. Quickly taking the cigarette out of
her mouth, Lisa blew the smoke out. "Yuck," she complained, "it tastes
terrible!" Patti grinned. "It's an acquired taste, kid, like drinking coffee.
Did you like the way coffee tastes the first time you tried it?" "No," Lisa
admitted. "Well," Patti said, "smoking's the same way. The more you smoke, the
more you get used to it. And the more you get used to it, the better you'll
like it. And the more you like it, the more you'll want it. And then," she
grinned, "you're hooked! That's because nicotine is like magic. Don't worry,
kid, your whole body will love smoking once you get used to it. Now, let's try
again."

    "Okay," Lisa replied. With some hesitation, she put the cigarette back in
her mouth. Smoking doesn't seem hard, she thought, but it certainly doesn't
taste good. Pulling lightly on the cigarette again, Lisa again felt her mouth
filling up with smoke. Seems slightly more tolerable this time, she thought,
but Lisa immediately blew the smoke out with a look of disgust on her face.
"You're doing great, Lisa," Patti said enthusiastically, "you haven't even
coughed. Here, let me show you how to get rid of that ash." Patti showed Lisa
how to tap ashes off in the ashtray, and continued the lesson for the balance
of the cigarette. Lisa would puff gently on the Marlboro Menthol and blow the
smoke out. Finally, Patti showed her how to crush the butt in the ashtray.

    "And that's it?" Lisa asked incredulously as she put it out. "That's all?"
"Hell, no," Lisa laughed in response, "this is just the beginning. I told you,
it'll take several cigarettes before you're ready for the next step. Once
you're used to it, we'll begin inhaling." This girl obviously loves to inhale,
Lisa thought. Patti's eyes shined whenever she talked about it. God, that's
what I'm waiting for; the good part. Lisa sighed. I sure haven't seen it yet!

    "Lisa, tell me," Patti asked, "what'd you think?" "Well," Lisa answered,
"it wasn't hard to do. At first, I didn't like it at all, but by the end of
the cigarette I got used to the taste and the smell. It wasn't fun, but it
wasn't too bad, I guess." "Great," Patti said, "you're doing great! You didn't
feel sick?" Lisa shook her head no. "And you never coughed," Patti commented.
"You're a natural, believe me." The waitress showed up with their food. "Hey,"
Patti suggested, "how about if we eat dinner and we'll try another cigarette
afterward?"

    The two of them ate. When they finished Patti said, "God, one of the
things you'll find when you're a smoker, Lisa, is that a cigarette tastes
really good after a meal. I want one, so you can try again, too." Patti got
out her case and extracted two cigarettes. "Take this one," Patti said,
handing it to Lisa, "I'm going to show you how to light up." Patti showed Lisa
how to put the cigarette between her lips.. Then Patti held the lighter for
her, and Lisa was able to get an even light the first time. Lisa was still
careful not to inhale, but by the end of her second cigarette she felt she had
mastered this part. The taste and feel of the smoke in her mouth were
beginning to feel almost pleasant to Lisa, and she felt comfortable holding
the smoke in her mouth longer before exhaling. "Actually," Lisa admitted, "I
kind of like it!" Patti was enthusiastic. "God, Lisa," she exclaimed, "you're
a real quick study! You'll be smoking like a pro before you know it. That job
is as good as yours!" Patti's praise excited Lisa. God, she thought, I'm going
to do this. I'm going to be a smoker. It's not as hard as I thought!

    Looking at her watch, Patti suggested they go to Rocky's Pub to meet
Patti's boyfriend, Rich. "We'll keep working on this project there," Patti
suggested. "Rich will get a huge kick out this. You know, he taught me how to
smoke!" When they arrived at Rocky's, the girls saw Rich sitting at a table
with another guy. "Hey," Patti said, "Brian came with him, Rich's roommate!"
God, worried Lisa, I'm not sure about doing this in front of an absolute
stranger. But she noticed both Brian and Rich were smoking. Lisa decided if
she was going to learn to smoke, it might as well be with other smokers..

    Rich already knew Lisa, and he quickly introduced her to Brian. Lisa found
them to be laid back, friendly guys. And, she thought, they're smokers! Patti
told them about Lisa's quest to become a smoker as soon as possible. She told
them Lisa had smoked two cigarettes already and was intent on keeping on. Rich
did get a big kick out of the whole idea. "This is great," he said, "because
we can help coach you, Lisa. I love an opportunity to initiate someone into
the delights of nicotine addiction," he added, "and at the same time decrease
the number of non-smokers in the world." Lisa smiled. She was pleased to have
the encouragement. But she was becoming impatient. She was ready to try
another cigarette.

    Reading Lisa's mind, Patti got out her case. "Now, Lisa," she announced
with a smile, "it's time to take the next step." Lisa looked puzzled. Patti
winked at Brian who smiled in response; he knew what Patti was referring to.
Patti handed a cigarette to Lisa, but before Patti lit it for her, Brian
reached over and offered a light. "Let me," he offered. "Thank you," Lisa
smiled, catching the flame on the tip of the cigarette like an expert. She
took a small puff and blew the smoke out immediately. In unison, everyone else
at the table lit up too.

    "Okay, Lisa," began Patti, exhaling a cloud of smoke while she talked,
"here's the deal. If you're going to be a smoker, you've got to inhale the
smoke down into your lungs. I think you're ready. The key is, don't be
surprised by your reflex reaction. When you pull smoke into your lungs for the
first time, you might gag a little. That's okay. It's normal. If you gag or
cough, we'll just try it again. You'll get it eventually. Are you okay with
that?" Lisa nodded. "Yeah, I'm used to having smoke in my mouth," she said,
"and I'm ready to try inhaling. Just tell me what to do." Then she smiled. "I
really want to do this."

    Patti took another drag of her own. "Good girl! Okay," she said, pausing
to exhale, "just do what you've been doing. Take a drag and hold it in your
mouth. But this time, instead of blowing it right out, breath it in a little
bit. Then blow it out. Like this." Patti took what for her was a small drag,
held the smoke for a second, and then opened her mouth and breathed in. After
waiting a moment, Patti exhaled a steady stream of smoke. Lisa'd been
impressed with the way it looked each time Patti did this. She nodded her
head. "I can do that," she said.

    Lisa put the cigarette in her mouth and took a puff. Then, like Patti, she
opened her mouth and breathed in. Immediately Lisa felt a sensation unlike
anything she'd ever experienced. The smoke seemed both hot and cold at the
same time as it traveled into her throat, down her windpipe and into her
lungs. Fighting an urge to cough, Lisa held it and then exhaled. For a moment
nothing came out; and then, a long, seemingly endless stream of blue smoke
began to exit her lips. She felt a rush of adrenaline. God, Lisa thought, this
is cool! I've done it!

    "That looked great," Brian exclaimed. "But how did it feel?" Lisa smiled
cautiously. She was very excited, but tried to appear casual. "Oh, it was
okay," she began. Then she smiled broadly. "Shit," she giggled, "actually, I
thought it was fun! I liked it!" Lisa looked at Patti. "And you were right,
Patti! Inhaling the smoke is the best part!" Rich patted her on the back.
"Congratulations," he grinned, "you've got the makings of a real smoker, kid!"
Lisa smiled back. "Well," Brian urged, "are you ready to try it again?" Lisa
nodded her head enthusiastically. "Yeah," she answered, "at first it felt
strange, but then it seemed really nice." She looked at the cigarette she was
holding between her fingers. It was her own cigarette, she thought as she
tapped the ashes into the ashtray! And I'm smoking it! "Yeah, I want to try it
again," Lisa said firmly, "right now!". Patti was practically ecstatic. "Good
girl," she almost shouted, "I said you were a natural! Be a smoker, Lisa. Go
for it!"

    With a big smile on her face, Lisa returned the cigarette to her lips.
This time she took a much longer drag and pulled the smoke much deeper into
her lungs. It didn't seem to burn as much this time. As she held it in, she
knew she'd learn to like this feeling, the sensation of having cool, menthol
smoke deep inside her lungs. Finally, while Patti, Rich and Brian all watched,
Lisa tipped her head back and exhaled another long stream of smoke toward the
ceiling. "By God," Patti said, clapping her hands, "I think she's got it!"

    Lisa smoked the rest of the cigarette the same way. By the end, she was
inhaling the smoke and holding it in her lungs almost as long as Patti did.
When she finally crushed it out, Lisa felt a little lightheaded. "It's the
nicotine," Rich explained, "your body needs to get used to it. But don't
worry," he smiled, "your body will get used to it real fast. And I mean real
fast! Isn't that right, guys?" Patti nodded enthusiastically. "You bet," she
grinned, "and I'm living proof of that! When Rich taught me to smoke, I was
smoking a pack a day within a couple of weeks." In response, Lisa frowned.
"But Heather told me that Judy Johnson wouldn't hire me for the job unless I
was already a pack a day smoker. Damn it, Patti, I don't have that much time!"

    Patti pulled a notepad and pen from her purse. "I know, Lisa," she said,
"and we're going to help you. Guys, let's make a list of the things Lisa needs
to work on to be a real smoker." Patti began to write at the top of the page:
"YOU'LL KNOW YOU'RE A REAL SMOKER WHEN:" "Okay," she said, "let's think about
what needs to be done." Together with Rich and Brian, she began to compose a
list of characteristics of a confirmed smoker. Lisa frowned again. She
appreciated the effort, but she knew the first and most important thing she
needed to do. She needed to keep smoking. "Guys, I want to have another
cigarette," Lisa announced, "and I mean now." Patti smiled. "I think it's
working," she teased.

    Patti handed Lisa another cigarette. This time Brain showed her how to use
the lighter. "That's good, "Patti said sarcastically, "you'll know you're a
real smoker when you can light your own cigarettes!" Lisa glared at her. "Shut
up, Patti," she smirked back. After a few tries, Lisa successfully ignited the
lighter. She lit her own cigarette, exhaled some smoke from the side of her
mouth and, as she handed the lighter back to Brian, left the lit cigarette
sitting in her mouth for a few moments while the smoke began surround her, the
way Patti always did. "Hey," Patti exclaimed, "that's pretty good." Then Lisa
put the cigarette between her fingers and took a long, leisurely drag. Opening
her mouth, she inhaled the smoke while removing the long, white cigarette from
her lips, and she drew it in deeply. As she held it in, enjoying the feeling
of smoke filling her lungs, Lisa decided to try exhaling through her nose.
Closing her mouth, she began to exhale. The same sensation she was learning to
enjoy in her mouth, throat and lungs began to fill her nasal passages. God,
she thought, this is fun! As the smoke escaped from her nostrils, Lisa smiled
a wicked smile. "List or no list," she said, "I'm going to be pack a day
smoker by Tuesday morning." The other three grinned at each other. "You know,"
Rich sighed, "I think she will."

    The rest of the evening went well. By the end, Lisa had smoked a total of
seven cigarettes, two at Hoolihans and five at Rocky's. Driving home, she felt
energized and excited. I'm going to make it, she told herself. She thought
about the experience of the whole evening and smiled. And the best part is,
she mused, I'm going to have a ball!

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