How Could She Say No?, Part 3

    3. The Interviews.

    Mark and Patti did visit the Jordans Wednesday evening. Because of Trish's
kindness the day before, Patti's initial prejudice against Trish's smoking
quickly dissipated. She decided not to comment about it during the visit. She
noticed Trish tried to be considerate, but Patti counted six cigarettes which
Trish smoked during the course of the evening. 

    Surprisingly, Patti didn't care as much as she thought she would. She
genuinely liked her new friend. They shared the same political opinions,
similar musical and movie interests, and enjoyed talking about how to relate
to their "new" daughters. Steve and Mark watched TV while the women talked.
Patti was glad Mark was making a friend, too.

    After the Steven's picnic, Megan and Heather quickly became inseparable.
Heather was in public school and Megan went to Patti's private school, but
both were finishing eighth grade and both seemed to enjoy talking about boys,
movies, music, and ... boys. 

    During the next week Patti and Trish got together several more times.
Always at the Jordans. Each time Trish invited Patti to drop over for coffee..
Patti realized she no longer minded the cigarette smoke. At first it bothered
her, but the more time they spent together the less Patti noticed it. She was
amazed how quickly she became tolerant of an odor she previously found
offensive. She also couldn't help but notice how much Trish seemed to enjoy
smoking. Smoking was a natural part of her new friend, Patti realized.

    By the end of the week one thing did concern Patti. Mark and Steve got
together every night. And Patti noticed the smell of smoke on Mark's breath
when they made love. He was smoking more often. It was obvious. Patti wasn't
happy about it. She'd encouraged Mark to quit smoking completely. When they
first met Mark rarely smoked, and even now he never smoked in Patti's
presence. But she knew he smoked on and off. He always had. 

    Mark's first wife, Amanda, smoked. According to Mark, Amanda quit smoking
right before their divorce and she became a bitch on wheels. Mark had tried to
quit, too, because Amanda pressured him. Their marriage ended soon thereafter.
Quitting smoking didn't cause the divorce. But it hadn't helped resolve the
tension between them. According to Mark, he and Amanda had always smoked
together. When Mark left Amanda, and started dating Patti, he told her he was
going to leave smoking behind, too. But of course he never completely quit.
And now he was backsliding. His friendship with Steve wasn't helping. Patti
wasn't sure what to do about it. But she wasn't happy. 

    On Friday the school year ended. Patti would have more free time to think
about things. What made it so easy for Mark to backslide, she wondered? And
why did Trish vigorously defend the joys of smoking? What rationalizations
justified starting in the first place, and continued to justify not quitting?


    In preparing her D.A.R.E. materials, Patti'd covered a great deal of
literature about tobacco's health risks. She knew the facts. Shoot, she
thought, everyone knew the facts. But as Patti watched Trish smoke when they
got together, Patti realized she'd never studied the psychological aspect of
smoking. With full access to all the information about the health risks
associated with smoking, young people still decided to smoke. Trish was pretty
intelligent. But she smoked. So what was it about the smoking experience which
made otherwise intelligent people, like Trish, disregard the health hazards
and keep right on smoking? Patti began to get excited. This would be a good
project for the summer. Something she could integrate into her D.A.R.E.
materials in the fall. This summer she'd find out more about the psychology of
nicotine addiction. On the last day of school Patti had picked up several
articles to read from the school library. But Patti had another, more
ambitious plan. She also decided she'd ask Trish for help on this project. 

    Trish was Patti's first close friend who was a serious and unrepentant
smoker. In order to understand the psychology of addiction, Patti decided it
would be helpful to interview some smokers. For background information. Many
questions remained unanswered in Patti's mind. What caused people to begin
smoking? What excuses and rationalizations did they use to justify not
quitting? What advice would they give to teenagers about how to avoid becoming
hooked? 

    Real life vignettes was the best way to illustrate the issue for middle
schoolers, i.e., how not to think about smoking. Patti was sure Trish would
agree to be interviewed. She thought her sister Miriam would also probably
agree, too, as long as Patti promised not to lecture about smoking in the
process. Patti smiled to herself. If it went well, she might even interview
Mark. And maybe Trish or Miriam would suggest some other candidates. 

    Having a goal for the summer pleased Patti. Over the weekend she read her
articles on the psychology of addiction and began to map out a series of
questions for her interviews.

    The more she read, the more excited about the project Patti became.
Finally she was ready. She would start by asking Trish. Trish was not
intimidating. Patti knew that, even if she screwed up, Trish would be
gracious. Interviewing Mark or Miriam would be more difficult. They'd already
suffered Patti's anti-smoking zeal. By comparison Trish would be easy to
interview. On Tuesday evening, eight days after they first met, over coffee
Patti explained the proposed project.

    "You want to know why I started smoking?" Trish mused aloud. She didn't
seem offended being a guinea pig for Patti's anti-smoking project. "Okay. I'll
tell you. For a lot of reasons, I guess." The two of them sat at Trish's
kitchen table. Trish stopped to light a cigarette. A pregnant pause followed
while Trish sucked the smoke into her lungs and furrowed her brow.

    "Okay, I first started smoking my sophomore year in college," she began.
"I was almost twenty pounds heavier then." Patti's face registered a look of
surprise. "Yeah, no kidding," Trish smiled. "And very self-conscious about my
weight. One of my friends in the dorm smoked. She said I should try it, just
to help lose a few pounds. She swore it was the secret of her success staying
thin. I was a compulsive eater in those days. I couldn't stop snacking while I
studied. So she taught me to smoke and we started studying together. Before
long whenever I felt like snacking I'd reach for a cigarette instead. It
didn't take long. I quickly developed a taste for tobacco. It seemed like I
couldn't get enough. I loved it. By the end of the year I'd lost fifteen
pounds. I was smoking a pack and a half a day." Trish paused to take a big
drag as if she were proud of herself. "I've never gained the weight back, and
I've been smoking at least a pack and a half every day ever since. That was
fourteen years ago," she concluded. "I've never regretted it."

    "So it was just a weight loss thing?" Patti asked.

    "At first," Trish admitted. "But I found smoking also helped calm me down.
Once I started smoking, I was much less hyper, much less stressed out. If I
felt upset or nervous, I didn't eat. I just lit up." She smiled. "You see,
Patti, nicotine is a wonder drug. It made me feel good. It helped me cope.
Drinking coffee and smoking cigarettes became a way of life. Of course, I also
loved the way cigarettes tasted. Still do. So I lit a cigarette when I first
woke up every morning. I lit up and smoked while I walked to class. I lit up
right after each class. I smoked over lunch. I smoked over dinner. I smoked
while I studied. I enjoyed life, enjoyed smoking, and lost twenty pounds."
Trish gave Patti a big grin. "That's why I refuse to apologize for being a
smoker, Patti. I like it and it likes me."

    Patti frowned. She'd never heard anyone defend smoking that way. "But what
about the health risks, Trish? You must worry about what smoking does to your
body, to your lungs?"

    Trish took another drag on her cigarette. "Oh, yeah, I think about it. But
see, I'm a smoker. That's just the way it is." She let the smoke escape from
her nose. "I'd rather live my life as a smoker and enjoy life. I don't want to
feel guilty, or try to pressure myself to quit, and feel miserable. And fat.
So whatever happens, happens. But I'll have no regrets."

    Patti was intrigued by Trish's candor. She really believed her own
rationalizations. Another reason why people should never start, she decided. I
can work this into my D.A.R.E. curriculum, she mused. People do lose weight by
smoking and they convince themselves it's worth the risks to smoke. Then they
convince themselves they don't want to quit because they also enjoy the filthy
habit. Trish was a classic case study in how people are bewitched into
becoming smokers. The perceived advantages can lead to untold
rationalization.

    The next evening Patti arranged to meet Miriam and her roommate Janet for
an interview. At Patti's request they met at Miriam's apartment. Patti didn't
know Janet very well and otherwise wouldn't have tried to interview her. But
Miriam told her she was frankly more comfortable having someone else present
while talking to her sister about smoking. Patti didn't mind. She explained
the purpose of the interview, to gain insight for her D.A.R.E. curriculum
about why people begin smoking and why they don't quit. Miriam and Janet were
hesitant but Patti promised she wouldn't lecture them. She just wanted to hear
them talk.

    "Why did I start smoking?" Miriam smiled with amusement. "Originally I
guess it was because I wanted to be a part of the cool crowd in college," she
sighed. "

    Janet and Miriam smiled at each other, as if they knew the punch line of
the joke which Patti didn't yet understand. "What do you mean?" Patti asked.

    "I never told you this," Miriam said. "But actually I started smoking in
high school." She saw the surprised look on Patti's face, but continued. "I
was so sick of being the little sister of Patti Conrad, the perfect student.
Every teacher I had compared me to you, Patti. It made me angry. You were
always Miss Perfect. You left quite a heritage behind at our high school. So I
decided to start smoking, in part to rebel against your damn image of
perfection."

    "This was all on your own?" Patti asked. She was intrigued by Miriam's
revelation.

    "No," smiled Miriam. "You remember my friend Connie McClennan? Well,
Connie smoked. I learned from Connie when we were juniors. It made me feel
delightfully wicked and grown up, like I'd done something no one else knew
about. I kept it a secret from Mom and Dad until I went to college. That's
when I decided to come out of the closet. Boy, were Mom and Dad pissed when
they found out!"

    Patti smiled involuntarily. She remembered very well. Her parents didn't
smoke and didn't like the idea of their little girl Miriam being a smoker.

    "Anyway," Miriam went on. "When I was in high school I never smoked much.
But I did like it. I thought it was cool. If I could have figured out how, I
would have smoked a lot more in high school. So when I got my college
registration materials, I didn't tell Mom and Dad but I checked the box on the
form to request a roommate who smoked. I decided when I went to college I
wanted to be a smoker. I wanted to room with a smoker so I could be friends
with other smokers." She grinned at her roommate again. "As you remember, my
assigned roommate was Janet. That's when I met her. She and the other smokers
in our freshman dorm accepted me into their circle right away. Bingo, I was a
smoker! And we've been rooming together, and smoking together, ever since"

    Patti involuntarily squirmed a bit. "Didn't you ever worry about the
health risks?" she inquired.

    "No," replied Miriam honestly. "I never did. I mean, I've seen all the bad
stuff they say on TV and in the papers. And I've been lectured by Mom and Dad
about how bad smoking is for you. And by you. But hell, Patti, I like to
smoke. I've always liked to smoke. I've just decided I'm not going to worry
about it."

    Patti's interest was growing. Miriam's story was horrifying and
fascinating at the same time. "Well, what was it about smoking that you liked?
And do you still like it? Do you have any regrets?"

    Miriam grinned. She reached for a pack of cigarettes on the table. Picking
it up, she shook out a cigarette and placed it in her mouth. It was all white.
Patti looked at the green package. "Salem Light 100's" said the wrapping
paper.

    "When I got to college I started smoking these," Miriam said with the
cigarette between her lips. She paused and flicked her lighter. Drawing on the
cigarette, Patti watched Miriam suck into her mouth the smoke which erupted
from the freshly lit cigarette. "I'd never smoked menthols before," Miriam
went on, beginning to exhale. "But Janet introduced me to Salems. Right away I
loved the cool sensation I got smoking menthols. They tasted different, better
than those Marlboros Connie and I used to smoke. Within my first week at
college I was smoking a pack a day," she said proudly. "I'd always loved the
way smoking made me feel. You know, the tingling sensation of pulling smoke
down into your lungs? But with menthols I loved that feeling even more.
They're so great," she sighed.

    Miriam took a big drag on her cigarette as if to demonstrate. Patti
watched her remove the cigarette and open her mouth. A ball of smoke rested
between her lips for a moment. Then it disappeared into Miriam's throat as if
pulled by an invisible rubber band. In a few seconds Miriam pursed her lips
and began to exhale. An endless stream of thick smoke escaped from her mouth
as she continued to smile.

    "And that's why I smoke, Patti. That's why I started, and that's why I
keep on smoking. I enjoy it. It's just that simple."

    Patti turned to Janet. "How about you, Janet?" she asked. "When did you
start smoking? And why?"

    Janet had lit up a cigarette of her own. She held hers between her fingers
as she thought for a moment before answering Patti's questions. She was a cute
girl, the same age as Miriam, and had dark brown hair which was cut short.

    "My story is different from Miriam's," Janet began. "Because both my
parents smoke. They smoked the whole time I was growing up. We never talked
about it, but I think they knew and probably assumed that someday I'd want to
smoke, too. See, I always loved the smell. As a kid I used to sit next to Mom
or Dad on the couch while we watched TV. I intentionally tried to breathe in
the smoke they exhaled. My older sister Ann was even worse. She started
smoking at 16. Well, she really started much earlier, but at 16 she came out
of the closet. After a brief argument with my Dad, my parents agreed she could
smoke in the open at home. So she did. All the time."

    Patti raised her eyebrows in disapproval. "It wasn't that big a deal,
really," Janet smiled in response. "I mean, how were they going to stop her?
And I didn't want to be left out. I was only 13 when I stole my first
cigarettes from Mom's pack. I was alone when I got home from school that day.
So I smoked my first cigarette at 13. God, it felt so good, so grown up.
Shortly after that I told Ann what I'd done. She's four years older than me,
so by then she was smoking regularly at home. She supplied me with cigarettes
and let me smoke in her room. I smoked in secret for a few years. I was 15
when my mom discovered what was going on. I was smoking half a pack a day by
then. Mom wasn't too upset. She said she expected it to happen sooner or
later. So I smoked in the open from then on, just like Ann."

    "But how could your parents in good conscience let both you and your
sister smoke like that?"

    "Patti, get real," Janet laughed. "How were they going to stop us? They
both smoked over a pack a day themselves." Janet paused to take a drag. She
inhaled the smoke and then slowly allowed it to escape from her nostrils. "I
can't ever remember not wanting to smoke. I saw how much my parents enjoyed
it. And how much Ann loved it. I knew it was cool."

    "Do you still feel that way? I mean, do you ever think about quitting?"
Patti asked.

    "No," Janet answered honestly. "I don't. The only regret I have is that
the whole fuckin' world is so anti-smoking that it makes me sick. I can't
smoke at work. I can't smoke in most restaurants or in malls. It makes me mad.
But I'm not sorry I'm smoking. Not at all."

    "So you've never thought about quitting? Not at all?"

    "Never," replied Janet. "I'll never quit. In fact, I think people who
don't smoke are missing out. I taught my littlest sister Tracy how to smoke
just last year. She's six years younger than me. Tracy was 16 and still hadn't
started smoking. I told her it was high time she learned. And just last month
I encouraged a friend of mine at work to start smoking again. She'd quit after
having a baby. But she missed her cigarettes; it was obvious. So I bugged her
about it. I'd go to lunch with her and blow smoke in her face. She finally
gave in and started up again. She thanked me afterwards. No, I don't think
about quitting. Frankly, I think people who don't smoke are stupid."

    Patti winced. Those were the same words Trish used when they first met.
Obviously these smokers loved the habit. Loved it enough to overlook the risks
and actually encourage others to start, or to start again.

    "So, Miriam, do you think I'm stupid because I don't smoke?" she asked.

    Miriam shook her head. "I don't think you're stupid, Patti. But you don't
know what you're missing. You shouldn't criticize something you don't
understand. I know you'll never smoke, but I'm not sorry I'm a smoker. You
won't put that in your D.A.R.E. speech. But it's the truth."

    Patti left Miriam's apartment in a daze. The wicked attraction of nicotine
is obviously stronger than I realized, she decided. These people are so
deluded they don't see the writing on the wall. Patti wasn't sure how to
distill the information she'd gathered. It was too upsetting. If nothing else,
she decided, it shows that smoking is far more powerful than I ever realized.
I've got to re-double my efforts to convince my school kids never to even try
it. Because once smoking hooks you, you become completely irrational.


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