Tale of Two Closets, Part 2

Tale of Two Closets (part 2)
an4@anon.lelnet.com   

Janice watched people heading out to lunch in groups of two or three and
thought about waiting a few moments and then sneaking out back and having a
cigarette. This was the first time that she had ever taken her cigarettes
back out of the house after bringing them in. The pack she'd opened this
morning was still three-quarters full and just having them with her made her
want one so bad.
  The office emptied out on Friday at lunch. Normally, she allowed herself
to be talked into going with a few of the women- Paula, Doreen, Milly,
sometimes Helen. Paula and Helen were smokers and they often sat in the
smoking section, but Helen had been in a meeting and Janice knew Paula would
never insist on the smoking section just for herself.
  She waited until the office had been empty for almost five minutes before
taking her purse out of her desk. She checked for the eighth time, saw her
cigarettes and smiled. This was going to be- fun. Walking out the back, she
double-checked to make sure that all the right cars were gone. They were.
She took the rectangular pack of cigarettes out, smiling.
  And then she saw Helen coming around the corner. Smoke was flowing from
her pert nostrils. 
  She jammed the pack back into her purse just before Helen looked up, met
her smile with one of her own.
  "I guess everyone left without me?"
  Helen followed the question with a long inhale on her shrinking cigarette.
  "Yeah. They all went to Ichari's."
  "I'm not a big fan of sushi," Hellen said, "or I might be miffed. I guess
you decided not to go with them, huh?"
  "No. I-" Janice realised that she didn't have a good reason for not going
and she felt a strange sense of dÈj‡ vu- that she was about to be caught in
a lie.
  "Is this your first day carrying?" Helen asked as she took one last pull
on the cigarette before stubbing it out in the standing ashtray by the door.
  "Carrying?" Janice asked thoroughly confused.
  "I saw the pack of cigarettes in your hand, dear."
  "Oh, I- yes," Janice answered, disconcerted.
  "Well, I think it's great. I'm looking forward to having someone else to
smoke with."
  "I- that is- nobody knows."
  "You're not going to be like Doreen and Milly, are you?"
  "What do you mean?"
  "That's exactly what I mean. You didn't know both of them smoke when
you're not around, did you?"
  Janice shook her head, surprised.
  "They both smoke when it's just them, Doreen and I. Oh they wouldn't smoke
here- they don't want people to know- but Doreen probably smokes half a pack
a day. I hope you're going to be a little more open than that. How long?"
  "About a month," Janice said, trying to fight he urge to feel like a
teenager caught by one of her parents.
  "But you haven't smoked in front of anyone but your roommate?"
  "Oh, she doesn't know. I've only smoked in front of one person."
  "A guy?" Helen teased.
  "No, not a guy- well, my next door neighbour. He is, I mean, he's a guy-"
  "But not a guy?"
  "You know what I mean. He did talk me into coming clean with my roommate
tonight, though. He seems like a nice guy."
  "Well, why don't we go to lunch at Mitchell's? We can sit in the smoking
section and after a few glasses of wine you won't care who you smoke in
front of."
  Helen took a pack of VS 120s from her purse and lit one. Janice watched
the easy way that she did it.
  Exhaling, she touched Janice on the arm. "Your turn, dear."
  Janice took the pack back out of the purse and lit one.
  "There, that wasn't so hard, was it?"
  "Well, I guess not. Let's go eat."

  Beth pulled her BMW into a parking space and killed the engine. She looked
over at Carl, smiled, and lit a cigarette.
  The look on his face said that this was indeed a date. Her exhale filled
the car once last time before they got out.
  The parking lot was full. Friday lunch on a whim at a upscale restaurant
was taking a chance, but Carl didn't care. He was already enjoying himself.
Beth's attitude towards him had clearly improved for the better. Thinking
back, maybe Charlene had good reason, if not a right, to be jealous. He and
Beth had been a lot closer than they had been at any time since until
perhaps today.
  Just as they walked in the front door, he saw Janice and a woman he didn't
know. 
  Both of them were smoking.
  Janice looked relaxed. She was laughing at something the other woman had
said just before taking a long drag on a VS120.
  He forced himself not to stare at this other woman, who was quite simply
gorgeous. Instead he gave a slight head nod to Janice to indicate that he
approved of the cigarette in her hand. She responded with a similar gesture
towards Beth, who saw Helen and opened her arms. The two women hugged.
  "How are you doing, Helen?"
  "Great. It's been almost a month, hasn't?"
  Carl and Janice exchanged looks.
The hostess came back from inside the restaurant and spoke to Helen. "We
only have one table for four in the smoking section and with it this busy,
the manager won't appreciate me seating a party of two."
"Well then, we'll just have to share our table with the attractive couple
standing behind us."
"Is that all right with you, sir?"
Feigning disappointment, Carl shrugged. "If you have to, I suppose that's
all right."
The hostess started, recognising Carl.
"Mr. Franks. Sorry, I didn't recognise you with a-"
She was about to say åwith a date.' It was true, that was what had thrown
her off, but-
"I know, Jill. You're not used to seeing me come in with a date. We all know
each other. Or I know Janice, and Beth and Helen, is it? Well, that will be
fine."
"Let me show you to your table."
As they walked towards the back of the restaurant, Jill leaned close to Carl
and said something only he could hear. It made him smile just a little.
They were shown to what was indeed the last open table in the smoking
section. They sat down and cross introductions were quickly handled.
"Beth and I went to school together," Helen said, drawing on her VS 120. "We
used to compete for the same men." Beth stroked Carl's arm- "Used to."
Janice was sitting across from Carl and nudged him on the shin with her
foot.
He took out his cigarettes and lit one just as Charlene waked over to the
table. Her eyes went wide seeing a cloud of smoke coming from Carl's mouth
but recovered from her surprise quickly.
"Can I start you with something to drink while you examine the menu?"
Carl smiled genially. "How about a bottle of the '98 Reisling reserve?"
"Will you all be having wine?" Charlene asked pleasantly.
They nodded and she walked away.
"So that's your ex-wife?" Janice asked.
Carl looked at her, puzzled.
"I overheard the hostess," she said archly. Then she drew deeply on her
cigarette and exhaled.
Charlene made a point of bringing the wine back quickly and opening it
professionally. She offered Carl the cork, which he sniffed, and then poured
him a small amount which he sampled and accepted.
She took their orders cheerfully and then disappeared. They didn't see her
after that for almost five minutes, and when she brought out their salads,
Helen, sitting on the outside of the table, noticed the smell of smoke on
her as she reached across the table.

Lunch went well. The four smokers got along very well, it turned out,
although Carl got the strange feeling that Helen was flirting with him every
chance that she had. When it was over, they settled the bill with cash and
left quite a nice tip for Charlene. But as they were getting up to leave,
Jill came back to the table and said something to Carl. He in turn spoke in
low tones to Beth, and then walked not out of the restaurant but through the
kitchen.
He went unchallenged out the back door and there was Charleene, leaning
against the wall and facing away from him. She trying desperately to light a
cigarette but then wind had kicked up again and she was having no luck. Carl
took out his own lighter and walked up to her. She accepted the light before
she realised who it was that was assisting her smoking.
She drew deeply on her cigarette, thinking it was one of her co-workers, but
she started when she realised it was Carl.
There were tears on her face.
"What up?" Carl said off-handedly. She had always thought it was funny when
he said that.
She looked at him, her eyes bright from tears.
"So you're finally dating again? Did you start smoking for her, too?"
"No." he paused while he thought about the right answer and tried to light
his own Marlboro Lights 100, but she had to return the favour before he
tasted the smoke.
"I started smoking right after you moved out. I missed it."
"Did you miss me?"
"Of course. I started smoking because it made me feeling like you were still
there, but- why are you crying? Are things with you and Deke-?"
It was a protective sort of question.
"Yes, they're fine. He's- his dad retired, sold him the business for a
percentage of the profits, so he works 8-4 in the office. And I finally am
going to be published. I got the advance on åIf Only' yesterday and I'll
only be working here another two weeks- I gave notice this morning. But-
shit, Carl, I don't know. It's like it wasn't really over until I saw you-"
  "With another woman?"
  "Exactly. Don't get me wrong. I didn't think you'd be waiting for me, and
I certainly think you're better off with someone you can trust, but-"
  She was starting to cry again.
  "I wish I had told you I was a smoker," she said as he moved in to hug
her.
  "Would it have made a difference?" he asked.
  She turned her head, brought her cigarette to her mouth, inhaled.
  "The first time I saw Deke after we were married- you were out of town for
the night in Boston and I wanted someone I could go out and smoke with. So I
called Deke, we had a few drinks- and- don't get me wrong, it's all my
fault- I mean, I know you wouldn't have minded if I did smoke, but yes.
Never would have called him."
  "We had some great sex, didn't we?"
  It was an odd question, but a fair one.
  "Yes, we did. I'm sorry, Carl."
  They looked each other in the eye, and then Charlene let out the exhale
she'd been holding, a perfect pert nose exhale.
  She turned her head and they kissed, deeply and passionately, like so many
kisses they had shared when they were married. It felt good, but it didn't
feel right.
  "I have to get back to Beth. Call me some time. Let's talk."
  Charlene nodded but didn't have the strength to speak, so she smoked
instead and Carl mimicked the act.
  

  "Do you think I should wait until she gets here to start smoking?" Janice
asked.
  "Please don't."
  "You do like watching us smoke, don't you?"
  Carl blushed, decided against lying. "Lunch was awesome."
  "Well then, I have two surprises for you."
  Carl checked to make sure he'd put Charlene's ashtrays out, saw the one by
the couch, pointed to it.
  "Well, light up then."
  Janice took the pack of VS 120s from her purse. It had already been
opened, Carl noticed. She lit one.
  "I decided to pick these up. Helen and Beth looked so elegant smoking
them."
  "What's the other surprise?"
  "Helen took your phone number from me. She thought you were charming- and
hot."
  He watched Janice draw on the cigarette.
  "You look pretty damn elegant yourself. So are those the two surprises?"
  "No. The Virginia Slims 120s are just a little bonus for you."
  "What's the second surprise?"
  "Helen and Beth have quite an history. They like- well, they like to date
the same guy at the same time. Can you say threesome?"
  "Beth said åused to.' "
  "Well, if used to means not since the last guy they dated. Come on, tell
me you haven't kissed two women at least today-"
  "I-" Carl said, flabbergasted.
  "You kissed your wife, and judging from that glow on your face, you and
Beth parked after lunch. "Am I right?"
  "Well-"
  "And did you go from frenching your wife to having sex in the back of
Beth's car?"
  "Maybe."
  Just then, the doorbell rang, saving him further awkwardness.
  For some reason he expected Maureen to be holding a cigarette when he
answered the door, but nothing of the sort happened. She smiled
attractively- Carl thought inwardly that it had been a long time since he'd
interacted with so many attractive socially in one day- in fact, not since
his wedding day. That made him think of the kiss with Charlene earlier today
and-
  "You did invite me over for dinner, right?" Maureen said innocently.
  "Oh, sorry. Do come in." He opened the storm door for her and she walked
past him. She smelled clean- shampoo and soap with an hint of perfume.
  "Janice is in the living room. I have to check on dinner." He turned into
the kitchen so that the roommates could be alone.
  Maureen smiled on the outside, but on the inside she felt an evil grin
welling up. Janice was about to get what she deserved twice over. Partially
for having thought she'd been fooling her, once for this morning.
  There was Janice on the couch, drawing on a Virginia Slims 120, not the
brand she'd been secretly smoking the last month. But the long cigarette
looked good in her hand and better coming away from her mouth.
  "How's it going?" Janice asked, her voice full of sweet nervous
excitement.
  Maureen walked in and sat down in a chair opposite the couch.
  "Great. But something seems different about you. Did you get your hair cut
?"
  "Would you like some wine or beer?" Carl called in from the kitchen.
  "Beer would be fine," Maureen said, noticing that was what Janice was
drinking.
  "I- I owe you an apology, Mo."
  "Why? Aren't we here to have dinner?"
  Janice groaned inwardly. Mo was only obtuse when she was playing games.
  "Yes, we're hear to have dinner. Look, I've been smoking for about a month
now, and I've just gotten up the nerve to tell you- with a little help from
Carl."
  Carl walked in carrying Maureen's beer. He handed it to her and smiled
pleasantly.
  "You're welcome to smoke, Maureen."
  Maureen smiled, the trap sprung.
  "Well, it's the damndest thing- I came here expecting to tell Janice a
little secret. I've decided to quit smoking- haven't had one all day, not
since I left for work. I stopped on the way, tossed out my lighter and my
last pack. Talk about ironic."
  "You're just teasing me !" Janice said perplexed.
  Mo tossed her purse onto the couch.
  "Go ahead and look."
  Janice opened the purse, still holding her cigarette. There were no
cigarettes and no lighter inside. Instead, there was a pack of nicotine gum
and a box of patches.
  "This is some sort of game."
  "What do mean? I had no idea that you were smoking, girlfriend."
  "I-" Janice was flustered. She drew on her cigarette, exhaled.
  "All that talk about how I'd be sorry I was smoking- I decided twelve
years was long enough and that it was time I grew up. I'm not some silly
teenager anymore. But I can imagine you're skeptical. Come closer, Carl."
  He bent down slightly, perplexed himself.
  "Smell my hair," she said, tossing her luxurious red curls. He bent closer
still, wondering if it was time to start a diary. He took a deep quaff of
her coif.
  "Like evergreen."
  "New shampoo."
  "I still don't believe it," Janoce said stubbornly.
  "I can imagine. You can't remember when I wasn't a smoker anymore. Well,
there's another test." She stood up, slid her arm around Carl's waist. "I'll
imagine that you've kissed plenty of smokers and non-smokers. Right?"
  "Yes."
  She brought her other arm around underneath his shoulder and guided his
head down.
  He looked into her eyes and she signalled something to him.
  "Kiss me."
  He looked into those blues eyes and he almost believed that she did want
him to kiss her. He angled his own head and kissed her, full open mouth. Her
tongue was alive and warm.
  Finally they broke the kiss. He turned to look at Janice, a dreamy, far
away look in his eyes.
  "Minty fresh."
  "Let's do that again," Maureen said, and this time the kiss was longer and
more passionate, until Janice was ready to scream.
  "I like you," Maureen said, half-serious, looking into Carl's dumbstruck
eyes. She turned to her friend, her arm still around his waist, pulling him
close.
  "Is there anyone you're not going to kiss tonight?" Janice said, looking
at her neighbour sharply.
  "I haven't kissed you yet," he said.
  "We might be able to arrange that," Maureen said, pecking him on the lips
again. Then she went and sat down next to her friend and gave her a sisterly
hug.
  "Don't worry. Just because I quit, don't feel strange about smoking. I'm
not going to give you an hard time like you were giving me until the last
month."
  She hugged her again.
  "You have to unquit," Janice said, somewhat petulant. "I was looking
forward to sharing this with you.
  Maureen feigned the most innocent look imaginable and trained it on Carl,
who felt the area south of his waist melt.
  "What do you think, Carl? Should I unquit?Would I be happier smoking?
Would I be more attractive and popular?"
  "With me, definitely," Carl said.
  Janice picked up the cigarettes and the lighter and thrust them into her
friend's hands.
  "Oh, these aren't my brand," she said. "Guess it's just time for me to
move on. I enjoyed smoking and all-"
  Carl knew her brand was the same as his. He picked up his own cigarettes,
took one from the pack and went over on the couch and sat down next to
Maureen.
  "I don't know, Carl. I just quit."
  He brought the cigarette up to her mouth, and she reluctantly allowed him
to place it between her lips. He then lit it for her. She drew on it as if
experimenting, exhaled, arching her slim neck back to blow smoke into the
air. She repeated the gesture. Janice sighed in relief and Mo decided to
have one last playful moment. She threw her arms around Carl, allowed
herself to become doe eyed.
  "Oh thank you, Carl. I don't know what I was thinking. She then kissed him
again, so long and hard and deep that Janice finally punched her on the arm.

  The three of them were sitting on the couch, one woman on each side of
Carl, who was regretting that one of the best days of his life would end in
a few hours. They were watching the FBI notice play out on the DVD.
  "So you overheard us down back this morning, didn't you?" Janice asked.
  "Yes. I cam back to get my meeting notes and I smelled smoke coming in
through the back window. I looked down there and the two of you were smoking
and talking. I heard everything and then I snuck out. But I'd known you were
smoking for three weeks."
  "Three weeks?"
  "One day you must have run out to get cigarettes about thirty seconds
after I left. You take that back way to the convenience store- I got stuck
at the light. When I went by, I saw you coming out of the store with a pack
of Marlboro Lights 100s in hand. When did you switch?"
  "I was out with a friend from work and Carl's lunch date and they were
smoking them. They look so cool."
  "I used to smoke those, remember? Jim thought they made me look hot."
  "What you did was mean," Janice said.
  "You deserved it, girl. All those years nagging me and then you start
smoking. Aargh ! I was really mad at you."
  "So all that kissing was just part of the game, right?" Carl asked, a
little relieved.
  Mo reached her arm around his waist and pulled him close.
  "No, I've wanted to do that since the day I first saw you. When I realised
that you smoke, too-"
  She kissed him again.
  Beth pulled him away from her roommate, took a deep inhale, and then
kissed him, smoke mingling in their mouths.
  Carl wondered how he was ever going to get through the movie.

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