Test Subject, Part 1

(by Phil420, 20 February 2006)

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Author's note:  The following story is satire, and is not intended to, in any
sense, impugn the fine folks at big tobacco companies who, no doubt, put
their customers best interests ahead of their profits.  

The author does not necessarily condone the use of tobacco, by adults or
minors, nor the use of illegal substances, nor masturbation, nor
participation in lesbian sex, nor any other morally questionable practice
depicted in the story.  Later parts of the story contain graphic sexual
language, and are not suitable for underage readers.  
Any resemblance to smoking fetish fiction is purely accidental.  
All other imaginable disclaimers apply.

Test Subject
Part 1: "A Lure"

Maureen Connolley awoke to the beeping of her alarm clock, and began the
morning routine that she had kept since moving out on her own earlier in the
year. She reached over, clicked the alarm off, and in one motion grabbed the
pack of cigarettes and the lighter that she kept on her nightstand. Rolling
over on her back, she flipped open the pack, took out a cigarette, put it
between her lips, clicked her lighter, and sucked deeply for a few seconds,
with her eyes only slightly open. She briefly opened her mouth to breathe in,
before beginning a second long drag, and then again breathed sharply in with
a slight popping sound. As the smoke soaked into her lungs for the first time
that day, she thought the same thing that she thought every morning after
waking up- "ah, that feels soooo good." After a few more seconds, she
exhaled, and then immediately repeated the process of taking a double drag,
closing her eyes as the smoke permeated her lungs, and then reluctantly
exhaling, only to take another immediate double pump. She closed her eyes,
listening to the crackle of the cigarette as she dragged on it, the popping
sound of her inhales, and the whoosh of her exhales. 

Maureen always smoked that way in the morning, and although she knew that it
was probably not the healthiest way to indulge in an already unhealthy habit,
she took an almost guilty pleasure in just giving in to her smoking addiction
in an unrestrained way, at least first thing in the morning. Her morning
nicotine was her favorite part of waking up. It felt very, very good. After
basically sucking in as much smoke as she could from that first daily
cigarette, Maureen always lit a second cigarette, which she would smoke a bit
more leisurely, and got out of bed to get ready for the day ahead.

Maureen was more or less your average, pretty college freshman girl. She was
5 ft. 5, 130 lbs, with very long brown hair, which she styled differently as
suited her mood, and bright, cheerful blue eyes. She got good grades, though
not stellar, and she enjoyed pretty much the same things that most college
girls like. She partied hard. She liked a wide variety of music, went to the
movies frequently, and dated regularly, though she hadn't met anybody she
felt she was ready to be serious with. She was physically in good shape;
though she had become a heavy smoker since going away to school, she kept an
active lifestyle and worked out regularly.

She continued her morning routine, looking at the day's news on the computer,
while she enjoyed a cup of coffee along with her cigarette. After finishing
both, she grabbed a quick shower, got dressed, smoked her third cigarette
while doing her hair and makeup, and then headed off to class, lighting up
her fourth cigarette of the day on her way out the door.

After her classes, she went to the student center to look for a possible room
for rent. She lived alone in an apartment off campus, but was looking for a
place a little bit less expensive, since her budget was increasingly tight.
Plus she was interested in getting a pet of some sort, maybe a little dog or
a cat. While looking at different bulletins, one of them caught her eye.

"Are you a female smoker? If so, you may qualify to participate in an
important study. We will pay a select number of applicants $1000 a week
during the duration of the study. If interested, please call (329) 764-8093
to set up an interview."

Maureen's interest was aroused by the bulletin. She could definitely use the
money, but it seemed strange to her that somebody was willing to pay so much.
"Is this some sort of quit smoking program?" she thought. There were
certainly plenty of potential applicants around campus. She hesitated only a
moment, and then decided to write down the number and give them a call, more
to satisfy her curiosity than anything else. 

She left the student center, and almost unconsciously reached into her purse
for a cigarette while she walked back. In one smooth, well-practiced motion,
she extracted a cigarette from the pack and put it in her mouth. She clicked
her lighter, torched the end of her cig, and sucked hard on the filter, her
cheeks caving in around it. When she'd taken a drag for a few seconds, she
pulled the cigarette out of her mouth with her characteristic slight popping
sound, and breathed audibly in. She felt herself instantly soothed, and held
the smoke in her lungs for a few seconds before exhaling. She repeated this
action about twenty more times, once every few seconds, while she made her
way back to her car and then drove to her apartment.

She arrived at her room, and went inside. She decided to call the number
right away.

Maureen was a bit surprised when a female voice answered, "A.T.C., how may I
help you?"

"Hi, I'm calling about a bulletin that I saw at the student center at my

"Yes. Are you at least 18 years of age?"

"I'm 19."

"Wonderful. Would you like to set up an interview?"

"Well, maybe. Could you tell me a little bit about what it involves?" Maureen
took her cigarette pack out of her purse, fished out another cigarette, and
put it between her lips.

"I'm sorry, but I can't divulge the subject of the study until you have
completed an interview."

Maureen clicked her lighter and lit up, chuffing out a bit of smoke before
taking a longer drag and breathing it in. She talked through her exhale,
"Well, can you tell me if it's some quit smoking program, or something like

The girl on the other end of the line almost sounded amused.  She said, "No.
Nothing like that. If you'd like to come in for an interview, we can give you
more information if you're selected. And I can offer to pay you $50 for your
time in completing the interview process."

"How long will it take?" Maureen asked after another puff.

"Probably around an hour or so. It just involves a questionnaire, and an
interview with our project manager."

"Might as well make some free and easy money," Maureen thought. "Ok, when
would be a good time to come in?"

"Any time that's good for you. We'll be open till 5."

"All right, I'm free this afternoon. I'll grab a bite to eat first. Would
around 2 work?"

"That'd be good. We'll be here. Our address is 140 Sycamore Dr., Ste 20.
What's your name, Miss?"

"I'm Maureen."

"Nice to meet you, Maureen. We'll see you at 2:00."

"Ok. Bye."

Maureen took a thoughtful drag on her cigarette, and wondered what this study
would be all about.

At 2:00 exactly, Maureen arrived at the address she had been given, and
walked into a nicely furnished waiting room type area, where she was greeted
first with a strong and pleasant odor of tobacco smoke in the room. She
approached the receptionist, and guessed that this had been the girl she had
spoken with on the phone. She looked to be about her age, and was petite and
attractive, with pretty, raven black hair. Maureen was somewhat interested to
notice that the young girl had a lit cigarette between her fingers, which she
took a deep drag on before looking up.

"Are you Maureen?" she asked, smoke punctuating the query.

"Yeah. I'm here for my interview."

"Hi. I'm glad to meet you.  My name is Emily. First, we have a questionnaire
for you to fill out. Would you like to come in and have a seat?"

Putting her cigarette between her lips and dragging on it, Emily rose from
her desk and led Maureen into another nicely decorated room with a single
desk in the middle. On the desk was a pen, some papers, and, interestingly,
an empty ashtray. 

"If you would, please fill this out, and then bring it back to me."

Maureen looked at her watch, and then sat down at the desk. On the desk there
was an empty ashtray and a pen. She picked up the pen, and then began filling
out the questionnaire. 

Please respond to the following questions as thoroughly and honestly as

Q. What is your full name?  Maureen Connolley

Q. How old are you?  I turned 19 last month.

Q. How old were you when you first tried smoking?  I tried it for the first
time in 7th grade. I think I was probably 12 or 13. 

(At this point, Maureen decided to have a cigarette while she completed her
answers. As she lit up in her customary way, she reflected that it was nice
to be in a place that seemed to be so smoker friendly.)

Q. Why did you try smoking?

(Maureen took another drag and filled her lungs as the memory came to her

Seeing how much my parents enjoyed smoking, I was really curious about it for
a long time, even though I knew that it was forbidden.  I finally decided to
try it one day when my parents were late coming home from work and there were
some cigarettes around the house.

Q. Did you start because of peer pressure?  No. None of my friends smoked at
the time.

Q. How old were you when you began smoking regularly?  The same age. I really
liked it and kept doing it after I tried it.

Q. Did you ever get in trouble for smoking? Explain.  Once. My father found
cigarettes in my room when I was a junior in high school and grounded me for
a month.

Q. Did you ever get any of your friends or siblings to try smoking? Explain.
Yes. I taught a couple of my friends to smoke.

Q. Have you ever tried to quit smoking? Explain.  Once. When I got caught my
parents made me quit.

Q. If yes, then why did you start back up?  Basically because it was hell. I
started back up the very first chance I got and just kept it hidden really
well till I moved out.

Q. Do you regret starting to smoke?  Not really. I don't regret anything that
I've done in my life. I enjoy it and accept that I'm a smoker.

Q. What are your feelings about the health risks of smoking?  I'm still
young, so I try not to worry about it.

Q. What brand of cigarette do you prefer and why?  I started with Marlboro
Lights because that's what brand my parents smoked. Since starting at college
I've been smoking Camel filters because they're strong, smooth, and

Q. How much do you smoke a day?  Usually about a pack and a half a day. More
on the weekends or if I'm stressed.

Q. Do you think that you will ever quit?  Maybe when I'm older, but right now
my philosophy is to just enjoy myself while I'm young.

Q. What is your opinion of anti-smoking laws in this state?  I think that
they're stupid, because people have a right to smoke if and when they want

Q. On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being very little, and 10 being very much,
how much do you enjoy smoking?  I'd have to say a 9.

Q. On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being very little, and 10 being very much,
how addicted are you to smoking?  Honestly, probably an 8 or 9.

Maureen finished her cigarette shortly before she finished filling out her
answers, and put it out in the ashtray that had been provided for her. She
looked briefly over her answers, and decided that she had responded to the
questions to her satisfaction. She got up, went back to the waiting room, and
gave the papers to Emily, who had just lit another cigarette. Maureen noticed
that Emily's ashtray was very full.

"You're done already?" asked Emily through a cloud of smoke. "Ok. If you'd
like to have a seat here, I'll take your questionnaire to the project
manager, Dr. Monroe."

Maureen waited for about 10 minutes while Dr. Cynthia Monroe looked over her
answers to the questionnaire. Dr. Monroe was in her early thirties, blonde,
and attractive in the sort of way that a sexy librarian might be. As the
project manager for A.T.C., one of her responsibilities was to carefully
screen potential subjects to ensure suitability for the study, as well as to
minimize the risks of legal complications.  As she examined the papers, she
also studied for a second time the hidden camera's video footage taken of
Maureen while she was completing the first step of the application process.
Dr. Monroe's attention was drawn to the image of Maureen casually lighting up
and dragging deeply on each puff while thoughtfully writing down her answers
to the questions posed to her. Occasionally Maureen would take a double pump
on her cigarette, and she varied her exhales through her mouth and nose.
Before each hit, she emptied her lungs completely so that she could take a
bigger dose of nicotine. "Best of all," Dr. Monroe thought, "Maureen seemed
to do all of this automatically and easily, as if it was second nature." She
would make a perfect test subject.

Dr. Monroe picked up the phone and pressed a button on the console. "Hi- Yes-
Yes, she did- Same here. All of her responses are perfect, so I think she
might work out quite nicely. I'll call her in."

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