Getting Rid of Ryan, Part 3 | |
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This fictional account contains adult language and themes. If such language and themes offend you, please do not read further. The persons and events described in this work are purely fictional. Any similarity to actual persons or events is strictly coincidental. Copyright 2003 by SSTORYMAN. All rights reserved. Permission is hereby granted to reproduce this story in any form and for any purpose as long as this notice is reproduced and no financial remuneration is received, directly or indirectly, by the person reproducing or using it. GETTING RID OF RYAN 3. Practicing Together. After her last class Christine drove home. She wasn't sure about this whole smoking scam. She liked Lia; it was nice getting to know her. But she wondered if Ryan would ever leave her alone even if he believed she smoked. And could she convince him? The commitment required was substantial. How many days did he have to see her smoking on campus before he finally believed it? And once she stopped would he resume pestering her? Maybe Lia was right. Perhaps she should file a complaint with the campus security office and get him written up as a stalker. But as much as she wanted to get rid of Ryan she also felt sorry for him. He wasn't a bad person; she was convinced of that. He was just obsessed. In his own way he was nice. She just didn't want to go out with him. So what should she do? She decided to talk to her mom about it when she got home. Kevin was out of town so Christine and Karen ate dinner alone. Unknown to Christine, for reasons she'd never have guessed Karen was keenly interested to know about her attempt to trick Ryan. "So, honey, how did it go today? Did you convince Ryan to bug off for good?" Christine sighed. "Not exactly, Mom. It was such a mess!" She proceeded to explain what happened, about practicing lighting up cigarettes in her car, involving Lia's help and her new friend's unexpected disclosure to Ryan that she used to smoke in high school and was even now smoking at home. "All the dumb stuff Lia said and my own awkwardness in trying to smoke made Ryan suspicious. He suspects I'm just doing it to trick him so he won't like me. He hates smokers but I'm afraid he knows I really don't smoke. He even threatened to call and ask you if it's true that I smoked in high school and that I smoke at home now." She paused. "I'm sorry, Mom. I figured it'd be easy, that Ryan would be turned off seeing me with a cigarette. Instead he's gonna watch me constantly now. So I either have to keep up the pretense or admit I did it to make him hate me. What do you think I should do, Mom?" Karen was delighted by this unexpected news. No one became a smoker after only one day of experimenting. It took much longer for addiction to set in. But this meant Christine's experiment had to continue. She might yet fall prey to nicotine's power. Karen felt guilty about feeling that way but she wanted it to happen. It'd deflect criticism away from her plan to return to smoking. Any good mother would encourage Christine to give it up. But for selfish reasons Karen didn't want to do that. "Honey, I think you should definitely stick with it awhile. You obviously hit Ryan's hot button with the smoking thing. Sure he's suspicious. He knows you want him not to be interested. But if you stay the course he'll soon decide you're not the girl for him. It can't be that hard to stick with it a little longer." Christine sighed. "I guess you're right. Lia suggested I just file a complaint with campus security and report Ryan as a stalker. I suppose he is stalking me, sort of. But I'm just not sure I want to get him in that kind of trouble. You know?" "No, don't do that," Karen asserted. Damn! It was logical and an option she never thought of. But it'd end Christine's smoking experiment. Karen didn't want that. No, she had to dissuade her daughter from that approach. "I only met Ryan twice. But he doesn't seem dangerous," she smiled. "He doesn't deserve serious trouble. He's immature, Christine, and is enamored with you. You're a pretty young woman. It's no surprise he dreams of being with you. We just need to find some way to convince him you're not the girl he wants. I still think you smoking is a perfect way to do it." "Yeah, I agree," Christine sighed heavily. "I don't want to ruin the poor boy's future. I just want him to leave me alone." She smiled. "He did look horrified when he saw me with that cigarette," she giggled. "I'm sure he did," Karen nodded. She was pleased that Christine wasn't inclined to report Ryan. "Stick with this smoking thing for a few days. I bet he'll lose all interest, Christine. Then you're free and can get on with your life." There was a long silence. It was time to press the issue. "So, honey, how did you feel about smoking? Was it really all that unpleasant?" Christine flashed a guilty smile. "At first, Mom, it was horrible. I hated it. But then Lia worked with me a little over lunch. Then it didn't seem so bad. She taught me to inhale." "Oh, really?" Karen feigned benign interest. "And what was that like?" "Weird," Christine exclaimed. "It felt so strange." She paused. "Hey, wait a minute. Didn't you used to smoke, Mom, years ago?" "In fact, yes, I did," Karen confirmed nonchalantly. Inside her heart was pounding but she remained outwardly tranquil. "Yeah, I used to smoke quite a lot, actually." Yeah, that's it! Bingo! Now come on, kid. Ask me more about it, she silently pleaded. "So I guess you know all about smoking. Right?" "Yeah, I sure do. I started smoking at about your age," Karen lied. She began way earlier than 18. "Yep, I smoked till I got pregnant with you when I was twenty-one. I kind of liked it, to be honest," she added wistfully. She waited for a reaction to this revelation. "Interesting," Christine smiled. "Yeah, by the end, I could kinda see why people smoke. I mean, I don't want to smoke myself or anything. But now I sort of understand why people like it so much." Karen salivated. "Did you say your friend Lia told you to practice? That's a good idea. Why not show me what you learned today? Just for fun," she added casually. "Oh God, I don't know, Mom. It'd be kind of embarrassing to smoke while you watch." "Nonsense, dear," Karen offhandedly assured her. She desperately wanted to make it happen now. "It'd be fun. Why, I could even smoke with you, I suppose, and give you some pointers. What do you think?" "Gosh, Mom, I don't know -." "Don't worry. It's nothing to be embarrassed about, Christine. We'll just work on your technique so you can convince Ryan it's real, even though it's not. You said you bought some cigarettes. Let's try it together. What do you say?" The teenager was finally convinced. "Okay, sure, I guess we can, Mom," she cautiously agreed. "I'll get the cigarettes and lighter." She bounced up the stairs. Meanwhile Karen wiped her brow. She was nervous! She wasn't sure how Christine would react. But she grinned wickedly. Her daughter bought it! Soon, in a few seconds she'd be smoking. Best of all she'd be smoking with her little girl beside her! Whether or not Christine herself decided to become a smoker Karen could now blame this supposedly innocent experiment for her own relapse back into nicotine addiction that she planned to announce as soon as possible. Christine returned with a half-empty pack of Marlboro Lights 100's and her disposable lighter. She sat at the kitchen table. "God, we should probably go to the porch to do this, don't you think?" "Oh come on, honey. A little smoke won't hurt anything," Karen smiled. "After all, you'd be more comfortable practicing in here, wouldn't you?" "Yeah, I guess so," she admitted. Then she hesitated. "Mom, are you sure you want to do this with me?" "Positive," Karen laughed a little too confidently. "Come on. Show me what you can do, Christine. I'm curious. Don't be self-conscious. It's just a game, after all," she added, hoping that ultimately it wouldn't prove to be. Christine pulled a cigarette from the pack and put it between her lips. She sheepishly looked at Karen, picked up her lighter and clicked it. She touched the tip of the cigarette to the flame and sucked as it ignited. Smoke filled her mouth and, just as Lia showed her, she inhaled it down into her chest. Karen's heart raced. She smelled her daughter's cigarette. The scent proved to be extraordinarily intoxicating. It was all she could do not to grab the pack and light one up for herself. Instead she smiled serenely at Christine as the youngster expertly exhaled. "My goodness," Karen effused. "You sure could've fooled me! To look at you I'd think you smoke all the time. How long did it take you to get that good at it?" "Thanks, Mom," Christine blushed. "Lia had me smoke three cigarettes with her today. She said I should go slow to not overdose on nicotine. By the last one I felt pretty confident. Lia says it doesn't matter, though; I still should practice." "I think your little friend is right," Karen smiled graciously. "You look okay, Chris, but looking totally comfortable is what will make this work. The more you practice the easier it will be to fool Ryan!" She hesitated. It was time! "Hey, let me have one of those. I'll see if I still remember how." "Are you sure, Mom?" "Yeah, why not?" Karen replied with casual assurance. "I want to help you, honey. The least I can do is suffer through this along with you." Without a word Christine slid the pack across the table. Karen picked it up, looked at it thoughtfully and shook out a cigarette. She sighed. "My God! It's been so long since I did this." It wasn't true. It was only hours since she smoked with Sharon. On her afternoon break she'd bummed another of her friend's cigarettes. Karen put the cigarette in her mouth. She smiled sweetly. "Well, here goes nothing!" She clicked the lighter, trying not to look as confident or as eager as she felt. Her cheeks collapsed as the cigarette ignited. She drew on it vigorously, pulling lots of smoke into her mouth. With no hesitation she breathed in, sucking the thick, creamy substance deep inside her lungs. She involuntarily groaned aloud. "Oh God, that's nice," she mumbled. "Very nice!" Christine watched. "God, Mom, you really _do_ know how to smoke, don't you?" Karen released an endless exhale. As she talked smoke kept coming from her smiling mouth. "Yeah, you never forget. Never. Doesn't matter how long it's been. Once you learn to smoke you can always pick it up again with no problem." Suddenly she felt self-conscious. She giggled uneasily. "This is kinda strange, isn't it? I mean, the two of us sitting here smoking together in the kitchen?" "Yeah, Mom, it's really weird," Christine agreed with a self-conscious grin. "But, seriously, I'm kinda glad you're doing it with me. It makes me feel less embarrassed. So, what things did you want to show me?" Karen hesitated. She hadn't really thought about teaching her anything. She just wanted to smoke. She trimmed her cigarette in the ashtray, buying time to think. Then she smiled. She had it. She'd get Christine to inhale deeper. After all, that was the key to addiction. "Hmm. I don't know. Let me think. Hey, I know. Let me see you inhale again," she suggested helpfully. "Perhaps I can give you some pointers." Christine put her cigarette in her mouth and dragged. It was a modest hit, but real. As she took it from her lips she breathed the smoke inside her chest. She looked apprehensive as she saw Karen staring at her. She smiled and pursed her lips to exhale. "Not bad," Karen nodded like the world's leading expert. "Not bad at all. But to really convince Ryan try dragging much longer and harder on the cigarette. Let your cheeks cave in when you do it. Like this." Karen dragged on her cigarette, noticeably hollowing her cheeks to demonstrate. She opened her mouth and snapped the smoke inside, drawing it deep in her lungs. "When you inhale," she went on, "breathe it in farther, as far as you can, like I'm doing. Then hold it in your lungs awhile before you finally exhale." She pursed her lips to release the smoke. "Like that," she concluded, pleased with herself. "That makes you look like a serious smoker!" Christine nodded. "I think I get it." She dragged harder and longer this time. Her cigarette crackled as the burning tobacco sizzled in response to the pressure. Finally she took it from her mouth and inhaled, imitating her mom's snap. This inhale was deeper; much deeper. The youngster's breasts elevated to make room for all the smoke inside her lungs. "How's that?" she asked, still holding it inside. "Better?" Karen laughed as Christine let it out. "Yeah, better. It's great, Christine. God, you look fabulous. So just practice awhile. Soon Ryan will be convinced." Karen took another hard hit. "Mom, what are you doing? Aren't you enjoying this a little too much?" Karen blushed. "Sorry, honey. It's just instinct I guess. Or maybe force of habit. A very old habit." She exhaled again. "I didn't even think about it. I just did it, I guess." Christine didn't seem concerned by her mom's answer. After manicuring her own cigarette in the ashtray she carefully placed it in her mouth. She dragged long and hard like Karen showed her and sucked more thick rich smoke deep down into her chest. She held it a few seconds and then exhaled confidently and energetically. "So that's all there is to it? Right?" "Yeah, basically," Karen smiled. "And the good thing is that the more you practice the more natural it becomes. I can teach you some tricks like exhaling through your nose and stuff. But basically you've got it. Here's what I think. Let's smoke a couple more tonight. You keep working just like you have been, honey. Then by tomorrow morning when Ryan sees you smoke you'll absolutely knock his socks off!" Christine watched her mother hit on her cigarette. The teenager made a face. "Mom, for someone who doesn't smoke you're sure entering in enthusiastically! What's up with that?" Karen thrust out her lower lip to exhale upward. "Oh, uh, nothing, honey. Yeah, nothing at all," she lied, though the guilty grin on her face almost gave her away. She cleared her throat and went on. "It's just that, well, even now after all this time I must admit that smoking still just seems so strangely pleasant. God, I don't know," she fibbed while de-ashing. "After trying it tonight, well, I don't know," she repeated. "I was thinking that maybe I might like to enjoy a cigarette every now and then from now on. Would that be so bad?" Her daughter frowned. "Smoking's not good for you, Mom. Or for me. I don't want you to start smoking. God, I'd feel so guilty if you did! I'm afraid it'd be my fault." Karen leaned forward. "Christine, by now you surely understand. Come on, be honest. Can you honestly tell me that you don't enjoy doing this? Don't you agree that pulling smoke inside your chest like this feels damn good?" Christine squirmed. "Mom, I know. I agree it's kinda cool; and it sort of grows on you, too. But that's not the point. It isn't a good idea. Who knows where it might lead?" Karen shrugged. Damn her conservative daughter! She had to try a different approach. "Okay, but do me a favor, Christine. Hit on your cigarette, inhale real deep like I showed you and then hold the smoke inside your chest awhile just like before. Go ahead. Do it." Christine complied. After a long drag she sucked a mouthful of smoke down into her lungs and held it inside. Finally she opened her mouth to exhale a stream of smoke into the air. "Now describe for me what just happened, what it felt like." Christine looked quizzically. "I smoked," she shrugged, not quite understanding. But seeing her mom's clear discontent with that answer she amplified. "Okay. I puffed on the cigarette, or dragged as you call it, and pretty hard, too. I felt the smoke fill up my mouth." "And? How did it taste?" "Okay," Christine offered. "I didn't hate it. I don't hate it anymore like I did at first." "Oh come on. You didn't hate it? That's all?" Christine tapped an ash in the ashtray. "Okay, it tastes good. I admit it. Happy?" "Yes, I am happy," Karen smiled. "What was next?" Christine sighed. "Then I took the cigarette out of my mouth and breathed in just like you and Lia showed me how. All the smoke traveled down my windpipe and into my chest." "And how did that feel?" "God, it felt warm; sort of full, I guess. I don't know how to describe it exactly." "Did it feel bad?" "No," Christine smiled apologetically. "It didn't feel bad at all. Actually it felt good, nice, in fact. I like how it feels," she admitted. "And when I breathe it in I feel a little buzz." "Right. But you like that buzz, don't you? It makes you feel good?" The teenager grinned again. "Yeah, it does. It _does_ make me feel good, I guess." "Okay. And then what happened?" "Mom, you're being weird," the teenager complained. But seeing the look on her mom's face she went on. "All right, then I opened my mouth and exhaled. The smoke came out a thick stream when I did that." "Exactly. And what did _that_ feel like?" The youngster blushed. "Gosh, Mom, I don't know what you're getting at. It felt nice, I guess. I kinda like watching it, controlling the smoke, when I breathe it out." "So, your overall evaluation of the smoking experience is what?" "Mom, this is crazy. Do you want me to admit I like smoking. Is that it? Okay, I will. Yeah, it's fun. Smoking's kind of satisfying in a weird sort of way. So what?" Karen laughed. "That's all I wanted you to say. I wanted you to admit that the smoking experience is very nice. Look, honey, I smoked when I was around your age. I only quit because your dad and I felt I should when I got pregnant with you. But smoking again here with you tonight? Well, it sure brings back lots of fond memories. It's really nice, like you just agreed." She gazed deep into her daughter's eyes. "So I'm saying I might want to do it again; to smoke, I mean" Christine tried to protest but Karen continued. "I like it, honey. I really don't care if you agree or even if you approve. And I also don't care if you want to smoke yourself. You do what you want. But I simply can't turn my back on it all over again for all the reasons you yourself just described for me. Smoking makes me feel good, just like it does for you." For emphasis Karen put her cigarette in her mouth and took a last drag before crushing it in the ashtray. Christine was stunned. "Mom! Are you saying that you actually don't care if I smoke?" Karen smiled smugly. "That's right, honey, I don't care; not a bit. I don't mind at all. But you're missing my main point. More important, I was trying to say that I almost forgot how much I used to enjoy this," she fibbed. "I plan to smoke myself from now on, dear. But if you do decide you want to join in and smoke along with me, no, I don't mind. In fact, not at all." "Oh my God!" Christine crushed her cigarette out. "Mom, this is upsetting. What's going on here? What's gotten into you? I mean, what will Dad say when you tell him?" Karen smirked. "Honestly, I don't care. I really don't give a shit what your father thinks. Smoking this cigarette was a revelation. It showed me once and for all what I want to do. I used to dream about becoming a smoker again, Christine, but I never did anything about it. Doing it with you here has helped me make up my mind. I want to smoke again. I want to be a smoker!" "Oh no," the teenager groaned. "Mom, I feel terrible doing this to you." Karen reached for the pack of Marlboro Lights 100's on the table. "Honey, don't feel bad. Thank you. I mean it. I'm happy about it and you should be, too. For once in my life I'm gonna do something that I want to do, just because I want to do it. It makes me feel good." She slipped another cigarette between her lips. "I want one more. Why don't you join me?" "No! God, I don't want to smoke anymore," whined Christine. "Not now!" "Okay, suit yourself," Karen shrugged, lighting up again. She smiled. God, it felt great to have smoke inside her lungs. She felt bad dumping the blame for her relapse on poor Christine. It wasn't fair but that was just too bad. She needed a scapegoat. Her daughter was simply in the wrong place at the wrong time. Karen double-pumped and savored the satisfying feeling of filling her lungs with smoke, lovely, thick, nicotine-loaded smoke! Karen could see Christine was upset. "Look, Chris, be as mad as you want about this," she went on. "But the simple fact is that tomorrow you'll have to smoke again for Ryan. If you don't, you'll look like an ass. So you may as well keep on practicing. Who knows? You might even decide you like it," she smirked. "Like I do." Before Christine answered the phone rang. Karen picked it up. Christine heard only her mom's side of the ensuing conversation. "Hello? Oh, hi, Ryan. - Yes, Christine's here. - What's that? - Okay, sure, let me confirm that for you. Yeah, Christine's definitely smoking. In fact, we're both sitting here smoking right this minute. - What? - Oh yeah, that's right, I smoke, too. - Well, I'm sorry you think it's disgusting, Ryan. But really it's none of your damn business, is it? - Yeah, that's right. Christine really did smoke all during high school. She kept it a secret from her coach and all the other girls on the track team. No one knew but her dad and me. - But why should I be upset about her smoking? After all, I smoke myself. - Actually, no, you heard me right. I don't mind Christine smoking. She's a big girl. She's over 18. She can make the decision for herself. - Yeah, well, I don't think she really wants to talk right now, Ryan. But I'm sure you'll see her tomorrow on campus and I'm sure she'll be smoking away now that she's started up again. - Okay, bye." She hung up the phone and giggled. "That was your soon-to-be former boyfriend," she smiled warmly. "Mom, I can't believe how you're handling this," Christine muttered angrily. "It's one thing if you want to smoke. That's bad enough but it's unbelievable that you want me to smoke, too!" Karen thoughtfully released an exhale toward the ceiling. "But honey, you already _do_ smoke. I just confirmed that to Ryan." She laughed at her own joke. "Look, I know you're upset by my sudden change of heart," she went on, turning serious. "But this isn't only about me. It's about you. You started down this smoky road of your own volition. My advice? Don't screw it up by getting sidetracked. Stay the course. Convince Ryan you're a bona fide smoker over the next few days. He'll be watching. And then once he ditches you, you can do whatever you want. Like I said, I don't care if you smoke. You're 18. It's totally up to you. But from now on I myself plan to be a smoker!" Christine was upset and confused. She retreated to her room. At first she appreciated having her mom's support. But her sudden unexpected and unbridled enthusiasm for smoking disturbed the teenager. Her mom was right about one thing, though. She had to stay the course and keep smoking till Ryan lost interest. It was the only reason why she tried it in the first place. She couldn't give up now, even though she felt terrible about inadvertently having led her mom into temptation. But maybe her mom would come to her senses. Maybe she wouldn't really turn into a smoker. Christine sighed. God, she sure hoped so! As it turned out, Christine was quite destined to be disappointed on that count! |
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