Metamorphosis, Part 3

Article 4843 of alt.sex.fetish.smoking:
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From: an443252@anon.penet.fi (totsecret)
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Date: Sat,  9 Dec 1995 06:33:57 UTC
Subject: Story: Metamorphosis (3/4)
Lines: 254


    Metamorphosis
    Part III -Not Innocent



    Laura jerked the pack of cigarettes so that a few stuck out, and extended
the pack to her mother. Anne took a cigarette out of the pack and put it
between her lips. Laura smiled at her mother lighting her third cigarette
ever, and lit up one herself.

    "So, how did you start smoking, Laura?" Anne looked away from her
reflection in the mirror and fixed her gaze on her daughter.

    "I started right before freshman year. Beth and I were hanging out here in
my room, and we decided we would go and buy a pack of cigarettes and see what
it was like."

    "Beth smokes too?" Anne took another quick puff. She was learning to smoke
right in front of Laura's eyes, much quicker than Laura expected.

    "Yes." Laura thought about what got her to start smoking, but did not say
anything more. It was too early in this new relationship with her mother to
divulge her inner thoughts.



    "For some reason mom had to show that she could handle smoking. She had
already puffed her first two cigarettes, but wanted to keep on smoking. After
she had puffed another I could see that she couldn't handle much more. She
finally went to bed, and I realized that five cigarettes were already gone
from the pack that had just been opened. That was pretty amazing, and I smoked
another in my bedroom. You wouldn't believe how cool it was to be able to have
a cigarette before bed." The girls were standing outside the school, Laura had
talked through home room and finished the story during this break between
periods.

    Cathy realized that today was going quite differently than normal. First
she had rushed to school to smoke before home room. Then when she went to her
first class, she made sure that her bag was packed and she was ready to leave
as soon as the bell rang. She rushed outside to hear the rest of the story,
but it wasn't until she took her first inhale that she realized she was here
to smoke, and the story was secondary.

    "But you said your mom took your cigarettes away from you, didn't you?"
Beth asked.

    "I think mom was having second thoughts about the whole deal when I lit my
second cigarette of the day right after breakfast, so she took my pack away
from me. She wanted me not to smoke in school, right? Which bummed me out
totally, so I told her to get a carton of cigarettes before she came home from
work so that she would follow her part of the bargain. I also said that I
wanted to see her smoke the cigarettes myself. That stopped her in her tracks,
and she realized that there was no going back on the deal."

    "I can't imagine what it would be like to smoke in the morning before
school, or any time at home for that matter," Beth replied. It was a sign of
how attentive they were that the girls had forsaken their cigarettes through
most of the story.

    "It WAS really amazing. When I got up this morning I thought about having
to wait until I got to school to have my first smoke, but suddenly I realized
that I didn't have to wait. I had one while I was dressing and then another
after breakfast. It was great. Oops, time for class. See you guys at lunch."
With that Laura inhaled deeply into her lungs, held the smoke inside her, and
exhaled. The whole group reluctantly ground out their cigarettes and headed
back to class.



    Laura didn't smoke all through lunch when her friends did. She thought she
should at least try at least to honor her bargain and try to cut down her
school smoking.

    "I'm not going to smoke at all until I get home," Laura said, "Who wants
to hang out with me after school?"

    "Your mom just wanted you to smoke at home, Laura, not all of us too." As
soon as Cathy said it, she the look on Laura's face and realized it was the
wrong thing to say. Trying to help Laura, she only annoyed her. She resigned
herself to spending another afternoon alone, but decided if it was like
yesterday it would not be that bad.

    "That's tough, I'm going to hang out with you guys and smoke no matter
what, so if I have to smoke at home after school I'll have to have you guys
over."



    After school Cathy had been on her way home when Laura asked her over.
Laura probably didn't want to snub her after her earlier emotional invitation,
but Cathy went along anyway. Even though Laura was aching for a cigarette when
she got home, she couldn't force herself to get out her pack right away when
they sat down to watch television. Julie took out her pack of cigarettes from
her bag, and drew out a cigarette. She held it between her fingers, and looked
expectantly at Laura. This was the push Laura needed, and she thankfully
retrieved her pack from where her mother had put it that morning. She
thankfully inhaled the first smoke she had in hours into her lungs. The smoke
rolled around her lungs as she took her cigarette from her lips. Finally she
exhaled with a smile on her face.

    That afternoon was unusual for all the girls in different ways. It was a
major change for Laura to hang out and smoke in her own TV room. After a few
hours, it stopped seeming quite so unreal, but she still wondered how her
mother would react when she came home. Except at parties Beth had never smoked
inside someone's house. At times she thought the smell of her own smoke would
be masked by her parent's if she smoked at home, but never tried it out. Just
being here was very unusual for Cathy. Inhaling was still a new thrill for
her, and smoking inside in nice surroundings was a nice change from smoking
outside alone.

    As the time of Laura's mother Anne's arrival from work came closer, Laura
had second thoughts about her mom arriving home to see her friends smoking in
her house. Pushing her mom too far had gotten her in trouble the previous
night, it would be stupid to do something similar today. But if she was only
going to smoke a little at school and then only at home, she'd have to be with
her friends. Mom would have to understand that.

    But the uncertainty of her mother's reaction stressed Laura to the point
of chain smoking. The more she smoked, the more there was to stress about,
which only encouraged her chain smoking. Her mother never got home before
5:30, and as soon as the clock said 5:30 she thought every sound was her
mother coming in the door.

    Finally there was the sound of Anne at the door. Cathy's impulse was to
put her cigarette out, and she realized that everyone else except Julie had
gotten anxious at the sound of Laura's mother. Everyone kept on smoking with
forced nonchalance as Anne followed the smoke and the sound of the television.

    When Anne appeared at the door, suddenly everyone realized that they
should get home for dinner. Looking at her mother's face Laura wanted to leave
too, but she couldn't. Instead, she decided to start with reason, and after
her friends left told her mother her reasons for having her friends over. This
Anne reluctantly accepted, and she went to the kitchen to cook..

    Anne was surprised when her daughter offered to help with dinner, she
couldn't think of the last time Laura had offered to do anything around the
house. In the kitchen they worked with a silent camaraderie. When the food was
cooking and Laura was cleaning a cutting board, Anne left the room. She
returned with a carton of Camels. Laura was a little surprised to see any
carton of cigarettes, much less one in her mom's hands.

    "How about we take a smoke break and watch the news?" Anne asked.

    When they sat down in the TV room, Anne opened the carton and put half of
the packs on the table.

    "Those are yours," she said and hefted the half full carton, "And these
are mine." Just like the previous night, Anne put up a great front. Laura was
surprised she had brought up the deal first, especially after how queasy Anne
had been when she had gone to sleep the night before.

    Anne only smoked that one cigarette that night, which gave her a pleasant
light headedness, and she went to her bedroom to do work when her daughter
took out her cigarettes after dinner. Anne knew that she wouldn't be able to
strengthen her bond with her daughter if she only smoked a cigarette a day,
much less ever finish the five packs any time soon. She decided that she would
try to smoke a cigarette after breakfast (Laura seemed to enjoy smoking after
meals), one when she got home, and one later in the evening. That next morning
after breakfast she started with her plan, to the great amazement of her
daughter.

    Laura reveled in the freedom to smoke at home, and in only a few days was
smoking over a pack a day on weekdays, and a pack and a half on weekends. This
was despite dropping back to only a few cigarettes during school.

    During that first week, they were actually having conversations a few
times a day, sometimes even when they weren't smoking together. Laura still
kept the story of how she started a secret, and didn't want to tell her about
Julie's deal and its outcome much less the fact that she had been dating a
college guy off and on (he was home on break now). Anne was starting to enjoy
her few cigarettes a day, but thought that it was mostly because she was
smoking with her daughter, and not because of the cigarettes themselves.

    Already, Laura noticed a difference in how Anne smoked. She seemed much
more natural smoking, she no longer seemed uncomfortable or nervous holding
her cigarette. But Anne was still just puffing her cigarettes, and needed to
learn how to inhale. Laura thought now was the time to show her mother how.
She had to make sure her mom would get addicted to smoking so she could keep
smoking after her mother finished five packs. After telling her almost the
same words she had said to Cathy less than a week before, Laura realized that
it wasn't just ulterior motives that drove her. She really wanted her mother
to get full enjoyment from smoking.

    Anne received some litigation with a tight deadline, which meant she would
have to work at the very least twelve hours a day. She would come home at her
usual time and work at home until going to sleep early in the morning for a
few hours. A few days into the project she was working at home when she
decided she wanted to get a drink from the kitchen, but on her way back to her
room she picked up a pack of cigarettes, lighter and ashtray. She had started
to notice the calming effects of tobacco, and decided she would just smoke one
to calm her nerves. When Laura came in to say goodnight, that one had turned
into three.

    Laura didn't mention the clause of their deal that required her to watch
her mother smoke all the cigarettes. By now she knew her mother wasn't going
to throw away cigarettes because she enjoyed them, even if her mother didn't
realize it. Laura had slowly seen her mother changing from puffing to inhaling
more and more often. At first her mother inhaled just to show her that she was
keeping her end of the deal in spirit, if not the letter. Now she actually
inhaled without making a production out of it.

    The next day Anne realized as she entered the house that she had rushed
home to smoke. The thought was brushed off as a symptom of the pressure at
work, and left her mind with the exhaled smoke of her quickly lit cigarette. A
few weeks ago she never could have imagined herself sitting in her own living
room, smoking a cigarette with her daughter and actually liking the
experience. But she thought of her smoking as temporary, and she kept it
secret from everyone. She now paid closer attention to all the people she saw
smoking around her, and thought it would be humiliating to reveal that she was
even smoking at all. Her past anti-smoking talk (they weren't tirades, were
they?) had left too big of an impression on too many people, so she only
smoked at home.

    Laura actually asked her about the pressure at work and told her a fairly
lengthy description of her day. Without realizing it, Anne took a second
cigarette out of the pack as she talked. Maybe smoking was more important to
her than she thought, but she knew it was just because of all the stress of
her job lately. In the past she would go running early every other morning,
even during crunch time at work. This would help allieve stress and didn't
take up much time. But since the deadline was imposed, by the time she left
work the pressure had built up again. After years of running every other day
without fail it seemed to take up too much time now, and she cut back to three
times a week.

    Anne was soon up to ten cigarettes a day, which to her seemed much less
than half a pack. She smoked these mostly while she was working at home. Now
when she came home, she would have a cigarette with Laura and her friends. The
irony of her only smoking at home with teenagers, and the teenagers smoking
everywhere but at their homes was not lost on her.

    She was having a recurring dream of being at work and craving a cigarette
through most of the day. Finally she would give in and sneak out the back exit
and fumble in her bag for cigarettes that she hopes are there. They luckily
are there, because this is the first time she has smoked outside her home.
After lighting up, she finally looks up and sees all the senior partners
looking down their nose at her and the cigarette between her fingers. They
walk by her into the building. She finally unfreezes and goes after them but
the door is locked. No one responds to the banging on the door, and she ends
up smoking alone, shut out.

    Waking up, she reaches for the pack next to her bed, and it only makes
herself feel more guilty. But this cigarette is special, it is the last one in
the fourth pack. She has one pack left. She will soon have to decide either to
try to quit or try to come to terms with smoking.

    End of part 3
    Part 4 soon!

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