Susan - A Young Mother, Part 4

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Subject: Susan - Kate's Birthday (Final Chapter)
Date: 26 Sep 1995 15:30:33 -0400
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Kate tried to make the cigarettes last as long as she could, but it seemed
so convenient to have what she thought to be a large supply.  By the time
she reached the 3rd pack her consumption had increased to 6 per day and
the need to smoke she felt was increasing.  After the 3rd pack was empty
she began to feel a little anxiety knowing that at the rate she was
smoking she would be out within 4 days.  She knew she needed to go back to
the hotel soon or she would be out of cigarettes completely which was the
last thing she wanted.  With only 4 cigarettes left, she was able to
muster enough courage to make another purchase at the vending machine. 
Although she was nervous of being caught, the thought of not being able to
fill her lungs with smoke gave her sufficient motivation to be successful.
 With no one around, she was able to buy 2 packs of Benson Hedges 
Menthol since her brand was not available.  She had smoked enough of her
fathers former brand to know that they were an excellent substitute.  The
wider filter felt a little funny in her lips and they didn't seem to be
quite as strong but they still provided her the smoking satisfaction she
now craved.

With the help of a few trips to the vending machine and a few cigarettes
from Sarah's parents, she was able to maintain her daily habit without
much problem.  Her birthday was now only 1 week away and she could not
wait until the day she would be able to light up right in front of her
parents.  It was a prospect the seemed too good to be true, yet she knew
she would be very nervous the first few times she smoked.  She still had a
pack and a half left in her possession and it was great knowing she
wouldn't have to go back to the vending machine again.  Three days before
her birthday she was sitting with her parents at the dinner table when her
father asked "so what do you want for your birthday Kate."  Kate didn't
hesitate to say "nothing except you guys following through with our deal. 
I've been waiting 9 months for this day and I can't wait."  Her father,
looking a little disappointed and not knowing of her continued smoking
said "are you sure this is what you want Kate?"  Kate responded "believe
me dad there is nothing I want more than to be able to smoke around here."

Later that evening Susan and Larry were discussing the prospects of Kate
smoking.  Larry said "well, I guess we have to follow through with our
agreement as much as I hate to."  Susan said "it will be hard to watch my
little baby smoke right in front of me; she seems so young.  I guess I'd
better go buy her some cigarettes tomorrow for the big day.  I can't
believe we haven't smoked for 9 months.  Do you miss it at all?"  Larry
responded "no, not really.  What about you?"  Susan said "there are times
that I really wish I was smoking again.  I hope it won't be difficult
watching he smoke my brand without wanting to light up myself."  Larry
said with a puzzled look on his face "how do you know she'll want to smoke
Virginia Slims?"  Anxiety shot in Susan's body as she tried to cover up
her miscue "well, I don't.  I guess I just assumed that she would since
they are the ones she tried with me." hoping he wouldn't catch on.  He
then said "you better find out first, don't you think?  Susan responded
with relief "I guess I should."

The following morning, Kate came down for breakfast excited as ever.  Her
mother sensing her anticipation asked "since I have a good idea what you
want for your birthday I won't ask.  But I do need to know what brand you
plan on smoking for your big day?"  Kate hardly being able to contain
herself said "your brand mom, or should I say your former brand.  Virginia
Slims Menthol."  Susan responded "that's what I thought but I figured I'd
better check with you first.  Will a carton be enough to hold you over for
a while."  Kate replied "that's plenty mom unless you want to start
smoking again with me."  Susan said "I don't think so."  Kate said "oh
c'mon mom, I know you miss it.  It will be great, we can smoke together." 
Susan said "do you have any idea how hard it was for me to quit smoking
after 20 plus years?  Let me tell you that after smoking for that long my
body did not want to give up the nicotine that I had been supplying every
day.  Some day, though, I think you'll found out for yourself.  You may
not think about it now but when the day comes and think your ready to
quit.  Think again."  Kate sat back and said "okay mom, no more lectures
about smoking."

Before going to bed on the evening prior to Kate's birthday, Susan placed
Kate's carton of Virginia Slims on the counter with a card.  Kate tossed
and turned the whole night, continuously staring at the clock hoping
morning would soon arrive.  She awoke promptly at 6:00 am hoping that her
mother was already awake.  She knew she wouldn't be able to wait for very
long to smoke and since she had used up the last of cigarettes the day
before, she needed a new supply.  She quickly dressed and went downstairs
to find her present sitting on the table.  She couldn't wait for her
parents to get up so she opened her first carton and took out a new pack,
opening it as fast as she could.  She tapped on the pack to expose the
cigarettes.  With her long slender fingers tipped with bright red nail
polish she retrieved her first cigarette.  As she flicked the flame of her
new lighter and touched it to the cigarette she began a long slow pull. 
As her mouth quickly filled with the 
mentholated smoke, she held it in her mouth for several seconds before
breathing it deep inside her lungs.  Before she had exhaled all the smoke
in her lungs she began to pull hard again taking an even stronger puff
inside of her.  As she exhaled she saw a steady stream of smoke exiting
her nose and mouth and felt extremely excited about her new freedom to
enjoy herself.  Within 15 minutes of finishing her first cigarette she was
back for more.  Kate was glad she able to smoke her first few cigarettes
without her parents watching over her.

At 7:00, her mother and father made their way downstairs to a family room
that smelled of smoke.  Susan saw Kate sitting on the couch with her
cigarettes close by and said "happy birthday honey, I see you found your
present."  Kate responded "I did; thanks mom, thanks dad."  Her father
chimed in "let see if your still thanking as for this present in a few
years."  "Don't worry about it dad, it's something that I really wanted to
do and I won't ever blame you guys for it" Kate returned.  Susan then said
"well lets see you smoke."  Kate began to feel very nervous at the
prospects of smoking in front of her parents but she figured that if it
wasn't for them she probably wouldn't be smoking now.  She fumbled with
the pack to retrieve a cigarette and Susan reassured her saying "don't be
nervous honey, it's no big deal."  Kate placed the cigarette to her lips
and struggled for a few seconds with the lighter before she finally
succeeded.  She took a small puff and inhaled the smoke just as she had
seen her mother do countless times.  She quickly exhaled and her mother
commented "now that wasn't so bad was it?"  Kate replied "I guess I'm a
little nervous smoking around you guys."  Larry responded "I'm sure you'll
get over that real quick."  Kate took another longer puff this time and
performed with more confidence as she let the smoke slip out of her mouth
before she quickly pulled it back into her lungs.  Susan then commented to
Larry "it looks like our baby is growing up."

It was a little awkward at first for everyone but as Kate became more self
assured she had no problem lighting up in front of her parents.  Susan and
Larry never made negative comments to Kate about her smoking which allowed
her to fully enjoy her habit.  Kate loved the fact that she could smoke
anytime she pleased and her consumption the first day was 10 cigarettes;
four more than her previous record.  It seemed that with her new freedom
of smoking her body began to crave cigarettes on a more frequent basis. 
Susan noticed that as the days progressed her daughters pulls on her
cigarettes were getting longer, deeper and more frequent.  She also
noticed that the filters on her cigarettes were getting darker by the day
which she knew from experience meant that she was taking more nicotine
into her small body.  Susan figured it wouldn't be long before her
daughter 
was a fully addicted smoker if she wasn't so already.  She started to feel
a little jealous of her daughters habit and couldn't help but think back
to how much she enjoyed that feeling that Kate was experiencing.  One
night as they observed their daughter enjoying yet another cigarette,
Larry made a quiet comment to Susan saying "she looks so much like you
when she smokes; it's incredible."  Susan said nothing but couldn't help
but try to remember what it felt like to inhale smoke again.  It became
increasingly difficult being in the same room with Kate when she smoked
without being overwhelmed by feelings of envy.

After about 2 weeks, Kate was quickly adjusting her habit up to almost a
pack a day.  With each passing day she felt the urge to smoke more and
more often.  She began to notice that she couldn't go longer than an hour
without having an intense craving to fill her lungs with smoke which she
didn't mind in the least because it felt so good to her.  One night as she
lit up, she noticed that her mother promptly left the room which she had
been doing a lot lately.  As she finished her cigarette Susan returned. 
Kate figuring that something must be up with her, said "mom, is my smoking
bothering you."  Susan reflected a few seconds then said "well, maybe just
a little.  It's just hard for me to watch you enjoy your cigarettes so
much."  Kate said perceptively "you want to smoke again 
don't you mom."  Susan was a little surprised said "is it that obvious" 
"Ya mom, it is.  Why don't you just start smoking again?"  Susan responded
"I don't know.  I've worked so hard to get this point but as soon as you
began smoking around me I couldn't help but feel jealous of you."  Kate
replied "what's the big deal if you smoke?"  Susan said "I guess it is no
big deal but I'm afraid I won't be able to quit again if I start."  Kate
replied "well you did it once, you could do it again."  Susan tried her
best to stop thinking about smoking but it became more and more difficult.
 Every time she saw Kate's Virginia Slims laying on the table she had a
tremendous desire to smoke one but she knew if she smoked just once she
would be hooked again.

Susan took Kate shopping several days later.  The took a break for lunch
and as they were finishing, Kate pulled her cigarettes out of her purse
and promptly lit one taking a large, dense puff of smoke deep into her
lungs and exhaled toward the ceiling.  Susan remembered how a great a
cigarette felt after a meal as soon as she smelled Kate's smoke it drove
her over the edge.  She said in a moment of weakness "Kate, let me have a
puff on your cigarette."  Kate smiled and handed her mother the cigarette
saying "sure mom."  Susan held it in her hand for several seconds as Kate
watched intently.  She then pulled the cigarette to her red lips and took
a small puff and inhaled quickly.  "It feels really weird to smoke again"
she said as she handed it back to Kate.  Kate then said "I don't know how
you can avoid smoking when I do.  I know that when I see someone 
smoking now I automatically feel like I need to smoke."  As she finished
taking a long puff, Kate handed the cigarette back to her mother who
quickly accepted.  Susan took a longer puff this time and held the smoke
in her lungs for several seconds.  "God that feels good.  I've missed
these things so much it's amazing.  That's the bad thing about smoking,
once you get used to enjoying them you never want to give them up."  They
finished up at lunch and returned home where Susan shared another
cigarette with Kate that evening.  With each puff she took it became more
and more clear that she would not be able to turn back.  It was rather
ironic that she would be influenced to start smoking from her young
daughter the same way Kate had been influenced by her.

THE END!
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